Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

no pain no gain, in some cultures, they told childrens that traying hard is the key to accomplishe goals, there are many advantages and disadvantages to hard work such as, trying hard bound to success and it can threaten the mentale health.

abandement is for losers, every try means new experiences which get you closer to the target, that can encourage childrens to be more productive and achieve there high level for knowledge both in the academic, daily life and work. children believe in their ability and become more confident when facing challenges, for instant, the confidence create generation that believe intheir ideas and dreams which raise public awarnes and country's economy.

children may believe that hard work guarantee success, which is not always true, which push young people to deprision potentialy mental health for exemple,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You address both sides of the question: you explain that effort can build confidence and productivity, and you note that believing effort guarantees success may harm mental health. However, the response only partially answers the task because these points are brief and not sufficiently explained; for example, the link between confidence, public awareness and the country’s economy is asserted rather than shown. The disadvantage is also left unfinished, ending with “for exemple,” so its consequences are unclear. The response is 114 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop relevant examples and explain your ideas. To improve, state your view clearly, complete both sides, and support each main point with a specific explanation or example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some organisation: the opening introduces the topic, the next section presents advantages, and the final section begins to discuss a disadvantage. Basic links such as “which” and “when” help connect ideas. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow because the response is not divided into clear paragraphs and several ideas are crowded into long sentences. The opening phrase “no pain no gain” is not clearly connected to the question, while the final sentence stops before completing its point. Some references, such as “that” and “which,” do not make the intended connection fully clear. Use separate paragraphs for the introduction, advantages, disadvantages and conclusion, and make each paragraph develop one main idea in a logical order.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “achieve,” “productive,” “confident,” “challenges” and “mental health,” which helps communicate the main subject. There are also attempts at more expressive language, such as “no pain no gain” and “closer to the target.” However, the range is limited, and repeated references to trying hard and success do not provide much precision. Several spelling errors, including “traying,” “accomplishe,” “abandement” and “awarnes,” make the writing less clear. Some word combinations are also awkward, such as “believe in their ability” when referring to children generally and “raise public awareness and country's economy.” Build a wider set of accurate phrases for effort, achievement and setbacks, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example, “children may believe that hard work guarantee success, which is not always true,” and you use subordinate clauses such as “when facing challenges.” These attempts show some range, but complex sentences are often faulty, and errors can make the meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “they told childrens,” “hard work guarantee,” and “which push young people,” where verb forms or agreement are incorrect. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention: the opening is a run-on sentence, and the final sentence is incomplete. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, check singular and plural agreement, and use full stops to separate ideas.

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