Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In some nations, it is widely believed that young children can get anything they want if they work hard. Due to this notion children feel motivated and set high aims despite unfavourable conditions. However, if these children are not guided properly, they may waste their time and energy in achieving impossible things.

The positive and motivated thought like a children can become anything if they work hard make them to set high goals and future standards. This realization allows them to stay motivated and curious despite unfavourable environmental conditions. For instance, if a young student belonging to a middle class family aims to pursue his higher education from an elite class university, which charge thousands of dollars per year. If he has a firm believe that he can get a scholarship to study there, this would motivate him to perform excellent in his academics and lab works. These students not only think bigger but also achieve higher.

On the other hand, believing that anything can be achieved with hard work without proper direction and guidance may results in the wastage of precious time and efforts of these students. Moreover, the set goals should be realistic and feasible. For example, if a Pakistani young citizen has a desire to become the president of the United States of America that would be total waste of time and efforts. To become a president of U.S.A., a person must have his seven proceeding ancestors be born in the U.S.A. Hence, along with efforts, a clear and focused direction is required from the experts in order to achieve realistic goals.

In conclusion, it's a realistic thought that children can achieve higher goals with hardwork despite unsuitable conditions but the proper guidance is required to follow this notion. This thought helps young children to feel motivated and curious unless they are aiming for something impossible.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both the advantages and disadvantages and maintain a clear overall view: ambition can motivate children, but guidance is needed to keep goals realistic. The scholarship example supports the benefit with a relevant explanation, while the example of a Pakistani citizen aspiring to become U.S. president illustrates a genuine limitation. This meets the task well, though the two sides are not equally developed: the positive example is explained in more detail, whereas the disadvantage is mainly framed as wasted effort and could explore its emotional or practical consequences. The conclusion restates your position, but “unless they are aiming for something impossible” is not fully consistent with the earlier emphasis on guidance. Develop the disadvantage further and make the final position more precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction presents both sides, separate body paragraphs discuss them, and a conclusion summarises the position. Transitions such as “However,” “For instance,” and “On the other hand” help readers follow the argument, and the examples are placed logically. Some cohesion is less controlled, however. The opening repeats the idea of motivation and high aims that is then developed in the next paragraph, while “This thought” in the conclusion could refer to more than one preceding idea. The long conditional example about university admission also makes the paragraph’s progression less smooth. To strengthen the organisation, reduce repeated points and use clearer references when drawing conclusions from examples.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range for the topic, including phrases such as “unfavourable conditions,” “firm believe,” “precious time and efforts,” and “realistic and feasible.” These choices communicate the main ideas, and some less common vocabulary shows an attempt to express nuance. However, several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, including “positive and motivated thought,” “set high goals and future standards,” and “perform excellent.” “Hardwork” is also conventionally written as two words, “hard work.” These issues do not prevent understanding, but they limit precision and naturalness. Aim for established combinations such as “a positive mindset,” “set ambitious goals,” and “perform well academically,” and check word forms and spelling during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including conditional sentences (“if these children are not guided properly”) and a concluding clause beginning “despite unsuitable conditions.” The overall meaning remains clear, but some grammatical errors recur and make parts of the response less controlled. For example, “a children can become” has an article and number mismatch, “make them to set” uses an incorrect verb pattern, and “may results” has incorrect agreement. In the university example, “which charge” does not agree with “university,” and “a firm believe” uses the wrong grammatical form. Review subject–verb agreement, articles, verb patterns, and noun/adjective forms. More accurate control of these structures would make your complex sentences easier to read.

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