Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In certain household kids are emphasized that hard work is key to success, nothing is impossible if enough struggle is endured and commitment is shown. In this essay we will discuss both positives and negative aspects of this statement.

Merits of notions are likes of encouraging generation that any goal can be achieved, if proper path is followed and necessary efforts are made. it gives confidence to youngsters to dream big and not settle for less. As in childhood every individual chooses a pathway, and this notion gives freedom and encouragement to toddlers makes them able to be not shy of setting any goal. Hard work commitment gives them right direction to do all the required effort with devotion and excel through each step till reach the goal. for instance, some kids want to be footballers which need a lot of hard work and physical endurance of different situation likes of resources, environments in form of tough weather condition, patience and discipline. This clear mind from young age have engraved hard work can lead to his goal gives motivation and strength to face any situation along the road. this endorses that hard work plays significant role to achieve bigger goals.

similarly, this gives mental clarity to individuals that they can be scientist, engineers doctors, athletes if they make the efforts. A student who wants to be doctor needs lots of efforts in studies to pass different stages of assessments, challenges which demand focus and sacrificing, any other social interests. with firm commitment for his goal supported by real endurance make the dream true.

Despite lots of merits this notion has certain shortcomings which can negatively influence the children. sometime hard work is not the only requirements to achieve a goal; certain other factors also needed like right direction, right environment, right guidance and suited mental situation. For instance, an individual wants to be pilot where his vision is also needed to be perfect, and kid is having vision issues, and he believes with good grads he can reach his goal despite realizing the physical requirements and once he is told that due to his medical conditions, he cannot become pilot kids goes into depression and disappointment. which shows that only hard work is not enough right choices also impacts the achievements of life goals.

though the notion is key in achieving the targets, but only hard works is not enough to achieve goals. combination of certain attributes along hard work makes set targets attainable .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both advantages and disadvantages and maintain a relevant overall position: effort can help children pursue goals, but it is not the only factor in success. The examples of aspiring footballers and doctors support the benefits, while the pilot example illustrates how physical requirements can limit what effort alone achieves. This covers the task, but some ideas are more fully explained than others. The benefits are repeated in several forms, whereas the disadvantage is developed mainly through one example. The point about guidance, environment and personal circumstances would be stronger if you explained how these factors affect outcomes and how adults can encourage ambition without promising that every goal is attainable.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, discussion of benefits, a contrasting paragraph on limitations, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Despite lots of merits” and “though” help signal the shift in argument, and the examples generally follow the points they illustrate. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because several ideas are joined into long sentences, and the benefits paragraph repeats the claim that effort leads to goals. Some references are unclear, such as “this notion” and “this clear mind,” so readers must infer what they refer to. Use clearer topic sentences, divide the examples into manageable sentences, and make each paragraph develop a distinct point rather than restating an earlier one.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “commitment,” “discipline,” “endurance,” “guidance,” and “disappointment.” These choices help communicate ideas about ambition and obstacles, and attempts at less common expressions show a willingness to vary your language. However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, for example “encouraging generation,” “mental clarity,” and “hard work commitment.” There are also spelling and word-form slips, including “grad” where “grades” is intended. These do not prevent the reader from understanding the main argument, but they reduce precision and fluency. Aim to learn vocabulary in natural combinations and check spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “if they make the efforts” and longer sentences explaining the pilot example. The main ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur and occasionally make relationships between ideas unclear. For example, “this notion gives freedom and encouragement to toddlers makes them able” combines clauses without a clear grammatical link, while “which need a lot of hard work” does not agree with its subject. Articles, plurals and verb forms also need attention, as in “the only requirements” and “this notion … gives.” Sentence boundaries and capitalisation are inconsistent, particularly after full stops. Build accuracy by separating long sentences and checking subject–verb agreement, articles and clause structure.

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