Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, it is common for some cultures to inform their children that they can do anything in case of they did their best. This essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trent.

One major advantage of engouraging children is making a promised, ambitious and hard-worked generation. This is because, we form the mindset of children to be successful persons in the future. For example, if i told my son that you should study hard to become a famous scientist and to be able to win nobel prize in chemistry, in this case I have planted the main idea in his sub-conscious to push him for a clear goal to be achieved, and the result will be positive in the future. Which cleary shows this benefit.

However, there are also some drawbacks to give children unconditional ability to achieve anything. One significant disadvantage is that children may consider this as an guarantee to doing anything without borders. For instance, if i do the same with my daughter may give her an extraordinary dreams which overcome her abilities. Furthermore, if she can not achieve any of these dreams, she would be disappointed. Which can cause negative effects and can make a loss of her convidence. So, it is very important to be honest and realible when giving hopes to children to avoid the opposite effect.

In conclusion, engouraging children to do anything if they try hard enough has both advantages and disadvantages. While it offers certain benefits, its drawbacks should not be ignored, and therefore it needs to be considered carefully.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and maintain a relevant focus on the effects of encouraging children to pursue ambitious goals. The advantage is illustrated through the example of a child aiming to become a scientist, while the disadvantage is explained through the possibility of disappointment if a child’s ambitions exceed their abilities. These examples make the response relevant, but some ideas are more fully developed than others: the benefit is mainly framed as motivation towards success, and the discussion could explain more clearly how the message helps children beyond setting a goal. The conclusion summarises the balanced view but adds little. To strengthen the response, explain the conditions under which this encouragement is helpful or harmful and develop each point with clearer reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “One major advantage,” “However,” and “In conclusion” makes the direction easy to follow, and the examples are placed under the relevant points. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger progression. However, cohesion is occasionally mechanical, and the sentence fragments “Which cleary shows this benefit” and “Which can cause negative effects” interrupt the flow rather than linking smoothly to the preceding ideas. Some references, such as “this” and “these dreams,” could also be more precise. Integrate explanations into complete sentences and use a wider range of natural links between claims and examples.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including topic-related terms such as “mindset,” “goal,” “disappointed,” and “negative effects.” There are also attempts at more ambitious language, for example “unconditional ability” and “sub-conscious,” but some choices are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision. Spelling errors such as “trent,” “engouraging,” “cleary,” and “convidence” are noticeable, while phrases such as “making a promised, ambitious and hard-worked generation” do not express the intended meaning clearly. The reader can generally understand your argument, but these errors sometimes make interpretation less smooth. Focus on accurate collocations and word forms, and proofread spelling; simpler, precise expressions will be more effective than ambitious but unclear phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional examples with “if” and a subordinate clause beginning “Furthermore.” The main ideas are usually understandable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity and control. For example, “in case of they did their best” has an incorrect clause pattern, and “if I do the same with my daughter may give her” lacks a clear grammatical subject and structure. The fragments beginning “Which” are also incomplete sentences, and article use is inaccurate in “an guarantee.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including lowercase “i” and “nobel.” Work on complete sentence construction, conditional forms, and articles, then check punctuation and capitalisation. More accurate control of these structures would make your reasoning easier to follow.

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