Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is a debate that , minors are often told that they can achive anything if they try to work hard. It contains several benifts, they are motivated, focus and have a plan that they can achive long term success and support from their parents are good enough to achieve carrer sucess. while it also leads to health issues, mental sickness due to the high expection from their parents. When they don't achive a particular task they saffer, feel stress and demotivated.

Firstly, instrucations from their parents that they can achieve anything if they work hard. It has several advantages children often feel's motivated, focus on achiving a particular task, and they have a long term goal which they work on it and recieve achievemnet. This motivation leads teenagers to work hard, if parents give support and guide them to work hard work's very well. Children are often lack of motivation, they are unable to find the way. In this way the parents guidance will help them achieving their desired task.

Secondaly, It has aslo some drawbacks when they are forced to work hard to achive anything. Every teenagers has their own ability working hard is not enough.At the last they feel stress and demotivated due to the high expection that woking hard is only enough. They suffers from some mentally health issues and hestiation of not achiving anything. At the last the parents expection also suffers and children are also less motivation and focus due to which their carrer and long term goals suffers.

In short, guidance leads to motivation and focus but it also leads to certain difficulties they suffer from mental problems and they carrer goal suffer. Parents should give advise to their children according to abilties so they can perfom well and achive a particular task.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question: the message may encourage motivation and long-term goals, while unrealistic expectations may contribute to stress and reduced confidence. Your final recommendation—that parents guide children according to their abilities—also gives the response a relevant direction. However, the discussion remains general and some points are not fully explained. For example, you mention that children may “feel stress and demotivated,” but do not clarify how this affects them or distinguish the message of believing in effort from pressure imposed by parents. The opening also shifts quickly from the question to parental support. Develop each advantage and disadvantage with a clear explanation or example, and make your position about the message itself more explicit throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a concluding recommendation. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondaly,” and “In short” help signal these stages. However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear: ideas about motivation, parental guidance, goals, and achievement are repeated rather than linked into a developed explanation. Some connections are also difficult to follow, such as “At the last the parents expection also suffers,” where the relationship between the child’s difficulties and the parents’ expectations is unclear. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main point, then explain it step by step. Vary linking devices and use pronouns or references carefully so readers can follow how each idea relates to the previous one.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “motivation,” “long term goal,” “mental health issues,” and “demotivated.” These choices make the main subject understandable. However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, particularly “achieve,” “work hard,” and “motivation.” Frequent spelling errors, including “achive,” “expection,” and “carrer,” also make the writing less clear and reduce the accuracy of your vocabulary. Some combinations are unnatural, such as “hestiation of not achiving anything” and “their carrer and long term goals suffers.” Build a wider set of accurate expressions for effort, expectations, and emotional effects, and check spelling and collocations carefully. More precise wording would help you express the ideas without relying on repeated general terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to combine ideas using clauses and conditional language, as in “When they don't achive a particular task they saffer,” and you use both simple and longer sentences. However, the range is limited, and complex sentences are often faulty. Errors in agreement and verb forms appear in examples such as “Every teenagers has” and “They suffers”; other sentence patterns are incomplete or awkward, including “Children are often lack of motivation.” Punctuation and sentence boundaries also need attention: the opening contains a comma after “that,” and several sentences run ideas together without clear separation. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles, and clause construction, then proofread each sentence for a clear subject and verb. Greater control of these basics will make your meaning easier to follow.

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