Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In many cultures children are taught that they can achieve any thing if they try hard enough. The advantages of this is that children will have high self esteem while on the other hand they may think to achieve things which out of sense.

Firstly student have high self esteeem if they work hard and achieve their targets they may work hard enough to get that for instance two students have high level exams on same date one is studying and breaking complex topics in easy way so he may got best result as compare to other one who is spending time on useless things like social media.

and Secondly i would like to say the disadvantage of it is demotivation if we tell children you can make rocket and we teach them art so it will be impossible task to make rocket.

so in conclusion children can achieve their targets if they are guided enough to support their dream children can face femotivation if they work on things they shouldn't

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address both sides of the question: you identify confidence and motivation as possible benefits, and demotivation or unrealistic expectations as disadvantages. However, the response only partially develops these points. The example about two students preparing for exams illustrates hard work, but its connection to the message that children can achieve anything is not fully explained. The rocket example suggests that children may be given an impossible goal, yet the distinction between encouraging effort and promising any outcome remains unclear. Your conclusion repeats the main points rather than resolving this issue. The response is also below the required 250 words, which limits how fully you can explain and support your ideas. Develop each advantage and disadvantage with a clear explanation and a relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

There is a basic overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph beginning “Firstly,” a paragraph introducing a disadvantage, and a conclusion. This helps the reader recognise the two sides of the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven, and some links are unclear. The opening sentence combines the benefit and drawback without clearly setting out your position, while “and Secondly” does not accurately signal the shift to the disadvantage. The exam example is a long, loosely connected sentence, and the final sentence introduces ideas about guidance and demotivation without linking them clearly. Use separate paragraphs for each main point, make the relationship between examples and claims explicit, and use a small range of accurate transitions rather than relying mainly on “Firstly” and “so in conclusion.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “self esteem,” “targets,” “demotivation,” and “impossible task,” so the main ideas can generally be understood. However, the range is limited and several choices or forms are inaccurate or unclear. “Achieve any thing” should be written as “achieve anything,” and “high self esteeem” contains a spelling error and inconsistent spacing. The phrase “out of sense” does not clearly express the intended idea, while “femotivation” appears to be a misspelling of “demotivation.” Some expressions, such as “useless things like social media,” are imprecise for an academic discussion. Aim for more precise wording and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a conditional idea in “if they work hard and achieve their targets,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in agreement and sentence structure appear in “The advantages of this is” and “Firstly student have,” where the subject and verb do not match. Several clauses are incomplete or joined awkwardly, as in “they may think to achieve things which out of sense” and “if we tell children you can make rocket and we teach them art so it will be impossible task.” Articles and verb forms also need attention, for example “make rocket” and “he may got best result.” Use shorter, complete sentences while checking subject–verb agreement, articles, and verb forms; then practise combining clauses accurately.

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