Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In some socities, a lesson is told to the younger generation that you can get anything you want by doing hardwork. Although it has some advantages but there are also some of the drawbacks. Teaching children this lesson builds confidence in them, while it also creates unrealistic expectations in mind.

One of the main advantage of teaching this lesson is that it makes children confident and keeps them motivated. By keeping this lesson in mind, they don't doubt on their efforts and continue their journey without any hesitation. In this way, they can achieve whatever they want by doing intense work. This creates self belief in them and they continue working towards their goals even when they face hardships and difficulties. For instance, if a student is not good at Maths, he with this mindset keeps doing continous hardwork and pay attention to Maths because he is aware that he can improve his grades.

One significant disadvantage of giving this message to children is that it creates unrealistic expectations in mind. They start beliving that they can do anything they want with only hardwork. But final outcomes also depends on other factors like mental capabilities, financial resources and experience level. They get disappointed when they don't achieve their goals only with hardwork. This creates a sense of demotivation and they lose hope. For example, if a young child tries to start a business on the only basis of hardwork without any financial resources he will soon give up and lose all the hopes.

In conclusion, teaching younger generation a lesson of self beleif comes with advantages as well as disadvanteges. This lesson gives rise to a motivated and hardworking mindset, ultimately help an individual succeed. While it also creates a sense of unrealistic expectations in mind without considering other factors contributing to one's success.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You address both sides of the question and maintain a clear position: the message can build confidence and motivation, but may also create unrealistic expectations. The body paragraphs extend these points with relevant explanations and examples, such as the student improving in Maths and the child attempting to start a business without resources. This fits the task well. To strengthen the response further, develop the limits of the message more precisely: for instance, distinguish between encouraging effort and promising that effort guarantees success, and explain how children could be taught to respond constructively when circumstances or outcomes are beyond their control. Some claims, such as that hard work enables children to achieve “whatever they want,” remain broad rather than fully qualified.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay has a clear, effective structure: an introduction presents both sides, each body paragraph focuses on one side, and the conclusion returns to the central contrast. Ideas progress logically from confidence and persistence to disappointment when other factors affect outcomes. Linking phrases such as “One of the main advantage,” “One significant disadvantage,” and “In conclusion” make the organisation easy to follow, while the examples are placed appropriately. To make the progression more polished, vary the repeated references to “this lesson” and “this message,” and use transitions that show the relationship between ideas rather than relying mainly on paragraph-opening signals. The conclusion’s final sentence could also connect the two sides more smoothly instead of repeating the contrast.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including relevant terms such as “unrealistic expectations,” “financial resources,” “self belief,” and “demotivation.” However, the range and control are uneven, with repeated reliance on “hardwork,” “lesson,” and “mindset,” and several inaccurate or unnatural choices. For example, “a lesson is told” is not a natural collocation, and “they don't doubt on their efforts” uses an unsuitable word pattern. Spelling errors such as “socities,” “continous,” “beliving,” and “disadvanteges” also reduce accuracy. Aim to use more precise expressions for effort, outcomes, and confidence, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession in the opening and conditional structures such as “if a student is not good at Maths” and “if a young child tries to start a business.” Most meaning remains clear, and the paragraphs include some well-connected sentences. Some grammatical errors persist, however. In “Although it has some advantages but,” the conjunctions are used together incorrectly; “One of the main advantage” needs a plural noun; and “final outcomes also depends” has a subject–verb agreement error. There are also issues with articles and sentence construction, as in “on the only basis of hardwork.” Review agreement, articles, and clause patterns, then proofread each sentence to improve accuracy while retaining your complex structures.

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