Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In some societies, children are told that any thing can be achieved if they strive for it. This message can have many benefits and drawbacks. It can give the youngsters motivation and make them enthusiastic to achieve their goals. On the contrary, you do not always get what you want with just putting more effort. It can cause unrealistic expectations and a negative outcome if those expectations are not achieved.

Examining the brighter side of this point, students will have an optimistic outlook on life. They will be more determined to achieve their aim. This will make the younger generation a hard working part of the society. Eventually this can bring more success to a particular community if their younger generation is more hustling and have a strong work ethic. For instance, in many cultures teachers make their students put more effort to achieve their desired objectives. This leads to more competitive students and they score better in the exams.

On the contrary, there can be some disadvantages. Because apart from hard work, a lot of other things are required to achieve certain goals. These things can be money, individual talent or a reference. A lot of people work hard but they lack the resources to get to their objective. For instance, if a certain individual wants to become an artist, apart from working hard he must have artistic skills. Moreover he must have money to cover financial cost of higher education. This can also lead to depression and suicidal thoughts among these people.

In conclusion, adults should tell the children to strive to get what they want. But they should also not raise their expectations so high that it leads to a negative outcome in the future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both the advantages and disadvantages and give a clear overall position: children should be encouraged to strive, but expectations should remain realistic. The benefits paragraph links effort with motivation, work ethic and exam performance, while the drawbacks paragraph explains that resources and talent can also affect success. This covers the task well. However, some points are asserted more than developed: the link between a hard-working generation and success for a community is broad, and the reference to depression and suicidal thoughts is serious but not explained. To strengthen the response, develop these consequences with clearer reasoning and make the examples more directly illustrate the message children receive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall structure, moving from an introduction to separate discussion of benefits and drawbacks before reaching a balanced conclusion. Paragraphing helps the reader follow the two sides, and signposts such as “On the contrary” make the contrast clear. Some connections are less smooth or precise, however. “Examining the brighter side of this point” is a somewhat mechanical transition, and “This” in “This can also lead to depression” has an unclear reference: it could refer to lacking resources, the example, or the broader situation. The conclusion also repeats the central contrast without drawing together the main reasons. Use more precise referencing and connect each example explicitly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range to discuss the topic, including “optimistic outlook,” “work ethic,” “resources,” and “unrealistic expectations.” These choices communicate the main ideas, and you attempt some less common expressions. At times, though, word choice or collocation is inaccurate or informal: “any thing” should be written as “anything,” “more hustling” is not natural in this context, and “cover financial cost” is awkward. “A reference” is also unclear as a factor in achieving goals. Choose more precise, natural phrases and check whether each expression fits the intended meaning. This would make the argument sound more controlled and appropriately academic while preserving its clear message.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex forms, including conditional phrasing (“if those expectations are not achieved”) and a subordinate clause beginning “Because apart from hard work…”. Meaning is generally clear, and errors do not usually prevent understanding. Some grammatical inaccuracies remain, particularly with agreement and sentence construction. For example, “their younger generation is more hustling and have a strong work ethic” shifts from singular “generation” to plural “have”; “Because apart from hard work…” is a fragment rather than a complete sentence; and “he must have money to cover financial cost” needs an article or plural form. Review agreement, articles and complete sentence structure, while continuing to use varied sentence patterns.

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