Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In some community, adolescent sometime believe that they can obtain anything if they maintain consistency and try harder. This essay will discuss many advantages to do work hard and will also highlights few disadvantages.

To commence with, at many places, teenagers are beliving to do work hard to living a life they were dreaming and get anything they want to achive in future. In othere words, maintaine a decipline everyday it facilitate obtaine new skills that will help them in future to utilize surviving skills and will be living thire dream life and self-beliving is main motivation in human life that every individuals must have. For example, some brands made websites which is helping that group which are not feeling motivate and lacking of self-esteam , user just need to create a acoount and note of daily routine and software will moniteing theire task and if any task is missed by them it also gives penaltey like run 2 kilometers , read 5 pages of book and a lot. Therefore, young people can standout by themsalves in future to take their own valuble decisions of their life.

Shifting towards the causes, some adolescent make their life like robot. To explicate, in teenage they can easily addicated to anything if they started that if they want anything if they must do hardwork. By this thougth few of them forget to live their childhood and will regret about it in future. For instance, according to times of india published a report last year that in top universities's student suffuring from the exusted life and country is top of the list by suciding young people ratio at globally. Thus, by mistake, it created heavy burden of responsibilies at young age by their gurdians it affect negative on them often.

In conclusion, although bealiving in them self is good habit that must be accuqired by children , becuse it will help teach how can they get anything that they dream, yet take it as a burden often they forget to actual meaning of leaving theire life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and give a clear overall view: believing in effort can help children develop skills and independence, while excessive pressure may make them miss out on childhood. The examples about daily routines and students experiencing exhaustion are relevant, and the conclusion restates the contrast. However, the advantages are explained more fully than the disadvantages, and some points need clearer links to the message children receive. For example, the website example focuses on motivation tools rather than directly showing how being told “you can achieve anything” benefits children. Develop each main idea with a more explicit explanation of its effect, and clarify that hard work cannot guarantee every outcome.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “To commence with,” “Shifting towards,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the broad direction. Within paragraphs, however, several ideas are crowded together, and the links between them are sometimes unclear. The long first body paragraph moves from discipline and skills to websites, penalties, and future decisions without a clear sequence. Some transitions, such as “Shifting towards the causes,” do not accurately describe the move to disadvantages. Organise each paragraph around one central claim, then explain and illustrate it in a more direct order; use referencing and linking phrases that show the precise relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary suited to the topic, including “self-believing,” “self-esteem,” “responsibilities,” and “burden,” and you use some relevant phrases about motivation and future decisions. However, the range is limited by repeated or imprecise wording, and frequent spelling and word-choice errors sometimes make meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “maintaine a decipline,” “surviving skills,” and “exusted life”; these do not express the intended ideas naturally. Several phrases also sound awkward, such as “living a life they were dreaming.” Build accuracy with common collocations before reaching for less familiar expressions, and proofread spelling and word forms. More precise vocabulary would make your arguments clearer and more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses with “if,” “that,” and “although,” and the overall meaning can usually be understood. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction can make some passages difficult to read. For example, “it facilitate obtaine new skills” has problems with subject–verb agreement and the verb pattern, while “some adolescent make their life like robot” has errors in number and article use. The conclusion’s “although … yet” construction is also not controlled. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a clearly formed subordinate clause, then check agreement, tense, and articles. Greater control of these patterns would improve clarity.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.