Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In western culture, they belive that telling children they can became anything if they do hard work, whereas their can be significant drawbacks of this belives as the critics argue. Benefits of such positive attitude keep them disciplined & motivated and freedom to dream. On the contrary, significant drawbacks can be getting in to bad influence or prison of instant success.

The major advantage of such teaching motivate childrent to work hard for their goals, which results higher chances of getting succed in their career. They became the main stream workforce for nation building. Another distinct benefit is that it boost the self confidence & generate winning attitude in youngsters. In the book of Shoe Dog, author Phil knight mentioned that their parents strongly focus o n his belives of harding working towards their goal.

Conversely the major drawback associated with this is if efforts are being in wrong directions, then there will be delayed success. Also bad influence can divert future generation into wrong and criminal activites. Without proper guidance and control, youths will be mislead easily. Over-confidence and jealousy will be developed easily. The recent protest in Delhi by Gen-Z is the perfect example of such belives.

In summary, although having postive attitude from parents towards their children present certain advantages, these are outweighed by the potential risks associated with say.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both advantages and disadvantages, and your position is broadly that the benefits of a positive attitude are outweighed by risks. Relevant advantages include motivation, discipline and confidence; disadvantages include misguided effort and harmful influences. However, the discussion is only partially developed: claims such as children becoming part of the “main stream workforce” and developing “jealousy” are not clearly explained, and the Delhi protest example is asserted rather than connected convincingly to the message in the question. The conclusion is also incomplete (“risks associated with say”), leaving your final judgement unclear. The response is 27 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to explain and support your ideas. Develop each point with a clear explanation or example and finish the conclusion fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a concluding paragraph. Transitions such as “On the contrary,” “Another distinct benefit,” and “Conversely” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear because several claims are placed together without showing how they relate. For example, the disadvantages move from delayed success to criminal activity, misleading influences, over-confidence and jealousy without a clear sequence or explanation. Some linking phrases also feel mechanical, and the final sentence is unfinished, weakening the overall closure. Organise each body paragraph around one main idea, then explain its consequence before moving to the next point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “disciplined,” “self confidence,” “winning attitude,” “guidance,” and “criminal activities,” and the reader can generally identify your intended points. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “prison of instant success,” “getting in to bad influence,” and “efforts are being in wrong directions.” Spelling and word-form errors—including “belive,” “succed,” “activites,” and “postive”—also reduce precision. Some expressions, such as “main stream workforce for nation building,” sound unnatural in context. Aim for accurate, natural combinations and check spelling carefully; precise phrasing will make your arguments easier to follow.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional structure in “Without proper guidance and control, youths will be mislead easily” and a contrastive opening with “although.” However, errors are frequent, and some sentences are difficult to interpret. Examples include “telling children they can became anything,” “The major advantage of such teaching motivate,” and “these are outweighed by the potential risks associated with say.” There are also problems with agreement, verb forms, articles and sentence construction, as in “it boost the self confidence” and “their parents strongly focus o n his belives.” Punctuation and the use of ampersands also make the writing less controlled. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and check each verb against its subject.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.