Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nowadays, children are being encouraged that they can be anything they want to be and that they can be successful as long as they try their hardest. In my point of view, I think it is a great way to encourage the youngsters. However, I think that we should remind them of the reality and guide them towards their successes.

The major advantage of telling kids to strive for their dreams would be the motivational aspects. This will keep them working hard for their dreams. This is one of the leading reason why kids nowadays find successes early in their life. They find passions in what they do and motivated to be the best in their field. For instance, world most famous athlete like Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo get their fame in their early twenties. This is undoubtely one of the best way to keep kids confident and dedicated.

However, there is a limitation to how far motivation can get you in your life. Motivation will keep you dedicated but skills and experiences are what make you succeed. The thing about kids is that they believe deeply what other people say especially their parents. If the parents keep feeding their child into the delusion that they can succeed, one day they will face the reality and fall. So the major drawback would be the kids getting detached from reality and growing arragont against their elders and friends.

To conclude, I will say that parents should encourage their children to chase their dreams while guiding them towards the best possible outcomes of their futures.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both the advantages and disadvantages and maintain a clear overall view: children should be encouraged, but parents should also guide them. The motivational benefit is explained through persistence and confidence, and the discussion of unrealistic expectations gives a relevant counterpoint. The Messi and Ronaldo example helps illustrate early achievement, though the link between their success and the message children receive is asserted rather than demonstrated. The disadvantage is also less fully developed: explain more specifically how believing effort guarantees success could affect a child when they encounter setbacks. Your conclusion restates your position, but the essay would be stronger with more balanced development and clearer support for each main claim.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response has a clear four-paragraph structure, moving from your position to an advantage, a disadvantage, and a conclusion. The contrast signalled by “However” is easy to follow, and the main ideas progress in a logical order. You also use linking phrases such as “For instance” and “To conclude” to guide the reader. At times, however, connections between claims are asserted rather than made explicit: the example of famous athletes does not clearly establish that parental encouragement caused their success. Some references, such as “This” in “This will keep them working hard,” could be more precise. Strengthen cohesion by making the relationship between each example and its point explicit, and vary transitions so the structure feels less formulaic.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary to discuss motivation, ambition, and outcomes, including “dedicated,” “confident,” “delusion,” and “detached from reality.” These choices help communicate the central argument, and the meaning remains clear despite some inaccurate or unnatural expressions. For example, “find successes early in their life” and “feeding their child into the delusion” do not collocate naturally, while “arragont” and “undoubtely” are misspelled. “The motivational aspects” is also vague where a more precise phrase could name the benefit. Aim for accurate collocations and check spelling, especially when using less familiar vocabulary; this would make your ideas sound more precise and controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “If the parents keep feeding their child …, one day they will face the reality and fall.” Most sentences communicate your meaning, and the paragraphing helps make the argument accessible. Some grammatical errors remain. For example, “one of the leading reason” needs plural agreement (“reasons”), and “world most famous athlete” needs a possessive form and plural agreement (“the world’s most famous athletes”). In “They find passions in what they do and motivated to be the best,” the second clause needs a verb (“are motivated”). Review agreement, articles, and parallel sentence structure, while continuing to use complex forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.