Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is true that in some cultures, children's are often told that if they try hard enough than they can achive anything the want. This massage helps the children to get motivated and encourage to go on in their life and if anyone try his best and get stuck with the work motivatively then the person can achive his desire goal easily.

On one hand if children's are motivated by delivering the positive massage then they will get the positivity in their mind and will ager to done the work. For instance, if teacher always try to get a child to do a very good result, he can encourage the student by telling him that if he study hard and do not brake his hope and remind his aim in life then the student will easily get his desire score in the exam.

Another possible reason could be, if anyone doing something for long time without stopping because of the massage- "you can achive anything if you try hard enough" then a person can be master on his field. For instance, if a children play football and practice his skills hardly and non-stop with proper dedication then he can be a better sports person in his life. The culture want to encourage and motivate the childer so that they can lead their life on a better path and achive their desire goals.

In conclusion, it is true that in some culture, childrens are often told that if they try hard they will achive anything they want and it is very true because it helps to creat motivation and encourage the children to go on a best path in their life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response addresses the positive side of the message, explaining that it can motivate children to study, persist, and practise football. These examples are relevant, but the task asks for both advantages and disadvantages, and no disadvantage is discussed. The conclusion repeats the positive view rather than weighing both sides, so the response only partially fulfils the task. Some claims also need clearer development: for example, the suggestion that a student will “easily get his desire score” does not explain how effort relates to outcomes or acknowledge that success is not guaranteed. To improve, present at least one realistic drawback, such as pressure, disappointment, or self-blame when a goal cannot be reached, and explain it with an example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The paragraphs generally stay focused on motivation and persistence, and signposts such as “On one hand,” “Another possible reason,” and “In conclusion” help show the intended organisation. However, there is no contrasting paragraph, so the progression does not cover the full discussion required by the task. Some links are repetitive or awkward, and the long opening sentence combines several ideas without clear boundaries. The examples also follow similar patterns and are not always connected explicitly to the main point. Organise the body around one advantage and one disadvantage, use clear topic sentences, and make each example’s relevance explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses a basic range of relevant vocabulary, including “motivated,” “dedication,” “practice,” and “encourage,” which allows the main positive message to be understood. However, vocabulary is repetitive, especially around “achive,” “motivate,” and “encourage,” and several spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable: “massage” for “message,” “ager” for “eager,” and “desire goal” for “desired goal.” Some combinations are unnatural, such as “delivering the positive message” and “practice his skills hardly.” These errors sometimes make the reader pause, although the general meaning remains recoverable. Build a wider set of precise expressions for persistence and its possible costs, and check spelling and common word partnerships before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts both simple and longer sentences, including conditional structures such as “if they try hard enough” and “if a children play football.” This shows an effort to express cause and result, but complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. Examples include “children’s are often told,” “if he study hard,” and “a person can be master on his field,” where agreement, plural forms, or sentence patterns are not controlled. Some sentences also run together, particularly in the introduction, making the relationships between ideas harder to follow. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles and plural nouns, then divide long sentences into shorter units and check each clause for a clear subject and verb.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.