Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is quite true that kids are generally claimed that they can acquire everything if they are tried their best.while this approach offers several benefits gaining cofidence and achieve higest path of the career,it also brings major drawbacks such as over confidence and over enthusiam give them a sense of destroy.

On one hand, there are a number of amenities available if children consider that the can pursue anything if they try hard enough.The one possible advantage is that they can gain more and more confidence.By gaining self confidence,they can pursue sucess in all stages of their life.As a result,they will be kept themselves motivated in further workplaceas well as academic life.The another possible benefit is that when children talked like that the other kids also felt motivated.Therfore ,they also try to do best in their postion.For instance,a student told his teacher that he will passed in the final examination by first rank and he try to do this ,the other class fellow will be inspired by him.Thus,they will grow together in their upcoming days,which will be helpful for the nation as well as the institutions.

On the other hand ,there are a number of disadvantages prevalent if kid believe that they will achieve everything if they try hard.Firstly, over confidence destroys their inner possibilities.COnsequently,they are doing things desparately which will fall them in trap and they destroy themselves.secondly,by doing any work with over enthususiam that results will not brings happiness.

IN conclusion.although confidently doing any work is good for children,but its drabacks are also huge for ki

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question: confidence and motivation are presented as benefits, while overconfidence and excessive enthusiasm are drawbacks. The examples about a student aiming for a top exam result and classmates being inspired help make the positive side more concrete. However, the disadvantages are only briefly stated and are not clearly explained; for example, “over confidence destroys their inner possibilities” does not show precisely how this message could harm a child. The conclusion is also incomplete, so your overall judgement is not fully established. To strengthen the response, explain each disadvantage with a clear cause-and-effect example and finish with a complete conclusion that directly weighs the benefits against the risks.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a concluding attempt. “On one hand” and “On the other hand” signal the two sides clearly, and the example is placed within the relevant paragraph. However, progression is uneven: the advantages paragraph develops several points, whereas the disadvantages paragraph is very short and its ideas are not connected or explained. Linking expressions such as “As a result” and “Firstly” are used, but some transitions feel mechanical, and references such as “that” in “when children talked like that” are unclear. The final sentence is cut off, weakening the ending. Organise each paragraph around one developed point, use clear references, and complete the conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “self confidence,” “motivated,” “over confidence,” and “inner possibilities.” These choices show an effort to discuss both positive and negative effects. However, the range is limited and many word choices, collocations, and spellings are inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning difficult to follow. For instance, “gain cofidence,” “achieve higest path of the career,” and “give them a sense of destroy” are not natural or clear expressions; “amenities” is also unsuitable for describing benefits. Repetition of “try,” “children,” and “confidence” further limits flexibility. Build a bank of accurate topic phrases and check spelling and collocation, especially when expressing cause and effect.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast in the opening and a conditional idea in “if they try hard enough.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries can make the message difficult to understand. Examples include “kids are generally claimed,” “if they are tried their best,” “they will be kept themselves motivated,” and “the other class fellow will be inspired.” Punctuation and capitalisation are also inconsistent, as in “IN conclusion.” Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a correctly formed subordinate clause, then check subject–verb agreement and verb tense. Clearer sentence boundaries would also improve readability.

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