Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In some socities parents motivates thier children by saying that hardwork can make their gaols achiveable. While thsi message can build a strong character. It also has some drawbacks.

There are two main advantages of this belief.First is that if childrens think success depends on effort then they are more likely to work hard and never give up from any failure and stay motivated in school. For instance a child who belives he can top in the class he will study for longer hours. Second reason is that it increase self confident and ambition. This postive imapct encourage students to dream big and try to do new challanges without any fear its lead to grater achivements.

However there is also some significant dsiadvantages it can crate unrealistic expectation and disapointed because in the rael life every thing depend on luck, talent and fainancial situations. For example if a children told i beacme a famous buissunesman might if did not he thought i am a failure person.The second drawback is through this childrens reamain stressed if they fail in their exams they blave themselves because they do not try to work hard. This can cause anxiety and menatl health problems especially when parents constantly push them.

Although telling childrens they can achive any thing its encourges to work hard and cofidence. Through this they do hardworking and succeed in their life. It can also cause disapointed if it is not in balanced with a realstic understanding of life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both advantages and disadvantages, and your position is broadly clear: the message can motivate children, but may also create unrealistic expectations and stress. Relevant examples include a child studying to top the class and the risk of self-blame after exam failure. However, several points are asserted rather than explained. For example, the claim that effort leads to “greater achievements” needs a clearer link to the message, while the businessperson example is difficult to follow. The conclusion repeats the main points but does not add a precise qualification about how parents should balance encouragement with realism. The response is also three words below the required minimum. Develop each main idea with a clearer explanation and example, and ensure the response meets the stated length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, one on disadvantages, and a conclusion. The contrast signalled by “However” helps readers follow the shift between sides, and “For instance” introduces an example. At times, though, the progression within paragraphs is less clear. The second advantage moves quickly from confidence to ambition and then to achievement, without explaining the links. In the disadvantages paragraph, the businessperson example and the point about exam stress are crowded together, and some references such as “This” are not fully clear. Use clearer topic sentences and develop one idea at a time; linking phrases should show the relationship between ideas rather than simply mark a new point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “self confident,” “unrealistic expectation,” “ambition,” “failure,” and “anxiety.” These choices show an attempt to discuss both motivation and its possible effects. However, spelling errors and inaccurate word forms are frequent and sometimes make the reader pause, as in “socities,” “gaols,” “disapointed,” and “fainancial.” Some expressions are also imprecise or unnatural, such as “give up from any failure” and “do new challanges.” This limits the clarity and flexibility of your vocabulary. Build a reliable set of topic-related collocations, check spelling carefully, and choose precise phrases for outcomes and emotional effects.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “if childrens think success depends on effort” and a contrastive opening with “While.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation often affect readability. For example, “it increase self confident” lacks correct subject–verb agreement and a suitable noun form, while “if a children told i beacme…” is difficult to interpret because the clause structure and reported speech are not controlled. The opening “While this message can build a strong character” is also left as a fragment. Practise complete sentences, accurate conditional patterns, and punctuation between clauses; proofreading for agreement and articles will make your ideas easier to follow.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.