Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Children is the future asset of the country.They will play an important role for development of the country. It is stated that children are cheerd up for achieving anything if try hard. I absolutely agree with this. It has different benefits and drawbags behind it. I will explain these points briefly.

To the start, some cultures cheer up there children by saying some words.one that is "come on my boy you can do it".It drops different benefit on them.Like, they started feel so comfortable. They know that in some cases if they do not succeed they will talk help from there elders. They know that there ancestors incouidge them. It boost up their confidence level. They become more confident than before.Gradually, they become mature. And know about the world's pattren. They make more hardwork for achieving their goal. They work day and night.

On the other side,it also has some drawbags.If some children is not interseted respective field. Elders told them to this work which was against their field. Elders cheerd up them. But, this is the biggest drawbag. Children fail in this work. And elders is only responsible for this failure.

In my perspective, they need to give complete freedom to do any work according to theirb interset. This will give them better result and also make them confident.

To conclude,cheering someone need to exact work in which they are interseted. It makes children more happy and mature with the passage of time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address both advantages and disadvantages, and your position is visible in the opening (“I absolutely agree”) and conclusion. The confidence-building benefit is relevant, with the point that children may seek help from elders if they do not succeed. However, the task asks for advantages and disadvantages of giving children the message that effort can achieve anything; the response sometimes shifts to encouragement for a particular field and children’s freedom to choose work. The disadvantage is only briefly explained, and the claim that elders are responsible for failure is not sufficiently supported. The response is also six words below the required minimum. Develop both sides with specific examples and explain how the message can motivate children while also creating unrealistic expectations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph on benefits, a paragraph on drawbacks, and a conclusion. Phrases such as “On the other side” help signal the change in viewpoint. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the benefits move quickly from seeking help to confidence, maturity, and working day and night without clearly showing how these points connect. Some linking is mechanical or inaccurate, and punctuation spacing makes transitions harder to read. Organise each body paragraph around one main idea, then explain and illustrate it before moving on. Clearer references and more natural transitions would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary, including “confidence level,” “mature,” and “freedom,” to discuss the effects of encouragement. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts of the response difficult to understand, such as “drawbags,” “cheerd up,” “incouidge,” and “pattren.” Some expressions are also unnatural, including “drops different benefit on them” and “talk help from there elders.” These errors sometimes obscure your intended meaning. Build a more accurate set of phrases for discussing motivation and consequences, and check spelling carefully. Using precise collocations such as “build confidence” and “seek support” would make your ideas clearer and more appropriate to the topic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both short statements and longer sentences, but the range is limited and errors occur frequently, sometimes making relationships between ideas unclear. For example, “Children is the future asset” has subject–verb disagreement, while “if try hard” lacks a subject. Other examples include “some children is not interested” and “Elders is only responsible,” where agreement is incorrect. Sentence boundaries and punctuation also need attention: several sentences run together, as in “one that is ‘come on my boy you can do it’.It drops…” Practise forming complete clauses, checking subject–verb agreement, and using full stops and commas consistently. More accurate simple sentences would help before attempting longer structures.

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