Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.5)
At present in some countries, teenager are usually told that they are capable to achieve anything if they work hard that is enough. Although it true that scholar can easily achieve any thing if they stay work hard because they have good knowledge and in the early age they can eaily learn anything.
On the one hand, There are numerous advantages of trying anything for teenager. One possible advantage is that they have good knowledge about anything and in a short time they can learn. In fact, when they set their focus anything they have to do it then they can easily reach their destination. Moreover, it can help them to improve their knowledge and build up new experience. For example, if any school student study hard for better result so they can easily get better result and complete their dream. As a result, teenager may able to do something new and in early age they get new opportunities.
One the other hand, one major problems for children if they try hard for achieve anything. To begins with when any scholar try hard for get anything and then if they fail their journey they may going to frustrated and increase their stress. Furthermore, this types of negative effects on their personal lives and that can destroy their final goal. For instance, if any science student try hard for create new innovation and they fail their experiment, it can negative impect on their study life. Therefore, in the early age children should reduce their trying hard for achieve anything.
In conclusion, although trying hard it is good for children because it can encourage children to do more and more; however, there are more disadvantge of this topic cause it can negative impect on their personal and study life overall.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You address both sides of the question by describing possible benefits, such as learning and gaining opportunities, and drawbacks, such as frustration and stress after failure. The examples about studying for better results and conducting a science experiment help make the discussion relevant. However, the response only partly explores the specific message that children can achieve anything through effort: much of the discussion shifts to trying hard in general, and the conclusion says there are “more disadvantage” without clearly explaining why. Some claims, such as children having “good knowledge about anything,” are unclear or insufficiently supported. To strengthen the response, explain more precisely how this message can build confidence and persistence, and how unrealistic expectations may lead to disappointment, while making your overall judgement clearer.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, a paragraph on disadvantages, and a conclusion. The contrast between “On the one hand” and “One the other hand,” along with “Moreover,” “For example,” and “Therefore,” helps signal the direction of the discussion. However, some links are mechanical, and the progression within paragraphs is not always clear. For instance, the advantage paragraph moves from knowledge to focus, experience, school results, and opportunities without fully showing how each point connects to the central message. References such as “this types of negative effects” are also unclear. Use fewer formulaic transitions and make each paragraph develop one main idea through explanation and a closely connected example.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “opportunities,” “frustrated,” “stress,” and “personal lives,” and the reader can generally understand the intended discussion. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repeated, particularly “try hard,” “easily,” and “anything.” There are also noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems, such as “complete their dream,” “negative impect,” and “new innovation,” which make some ideas less clear or natural. Aim to use more precise expressions for effort, achievement, and setbacks, and check spelling carefully. Replacing repeated general wording with topic-specific vocabulary would make the argument clearer and more effective.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a concession in “Although it true that…” and conditional examples beginning with “if.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur frequently enough to make some passages difficult to follow. Examples include “teenager are usually told,” “they are capable to achieve,” and “when any scholar try hard… they may going to frustrated.” Several sentences also lack a clear grammatical connection between clauses. Practise building accurate sentences with a subject and correctly formed verb, especially after “if,” “when,” and modal verbs. Greater control of these patterns will let you express your ideas more clearly.
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