Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

in various cultures infants are said they can achive anything in life if they try hard enough,This can cause the child to be more confident and expressive in life but it can cause them to feel betrayed in life when they reach a wall they cannot climb over.

children become a confident version of themselfs,infant who are taught to dream and know that nothing is immposible usally tend to be more expressive and confidentand this happens as they have a chain of positive encouragment early on.

recently a study showed that children who taught to dream big tend to be more confident and have comples dreams .

feeling betrayed when goals are not met, it happens because when they reach a set back or a wall they cannot cross they realise that it was a lie and thier on self confidence decreases towards ruin. the effects vary on hgow old they are when they reach the first set back

eg children who undestand they can achive anything are seen to become over confident as they age this make sthem make mistakes and stuimble in life.

overall, i think everything is fine in a limit after a certain point it can become an obsesstion and as the belife can make or break someone as seen above

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both sides of the question: the message may build confidence and expressiveness, while unrealistic expectations may lead to disappointment or overconfidence. Your concluding view—that encouragement is beneficial “in a limit”—also gives the response a basic position. However, the advantages and disadvantages are only briefly explained, and examples such as the reference to “a study” are not specific or developed. The discussion of setbacks could explain more clearly how children might be taught to respond constructively when goals are not achieved. The response also does not meet the required minimum of 250 words, which limits the opportunity to develop the ideas. To strengthen the answer, explain each effect with a clear cause-and-effect example and make your final position more precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph on confidence, a paragraph on disappointment, and a conclusion. This helps the reader identify the two sides of the issue. However, progression within paragraphs is limited, and several ideas are placed together without clear links. For example, the shift from children feeling betrayed to their self-confidence declining, then to becoming overconfident, needs clearer explanation. Linking phrases such as “This is because” or “For example” could show how each point supports the main idea. Some transitions are also abrupt, and the conclusion repeats the idea of limits without drawing the discussion together. Develop a clearer sequence within each paragraph and use referencing consistently.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary, including “confident,” “expressive,” “set back,” and “self confidence,” to discuss the effects of encouragement. There are also attempts at more specific expressions such as “positive encouragement” and “over confident.” However, the range is limited and several phrases are imprecise or awkward, including “reach a wall they cannot climb over” and “complex dreams.” Frequent spelling errors—such as “achive,” “immposible,” and “encouragment”—make the writing less clear and distract the reader. Aim to use accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. For instance, “face an obstacle” is more concise than the wall metaphor, while “ambitious goals” expresses the intended meaning more clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer cause-and-effect sentences, such as the sentence beginning “it happens because when they reach a set back.” However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors are frequent enough to make some relationships difficult to follow. The opening is a sentence fragment, and several sentences run together without appropriate capitalisation or punctuation. There are also problems with agreement and sentence construction, as in “this make sthem make mistakes,” and the clause “children who taught to dream big” is missing a verb form. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, then use full stops to separate ideas. Accurate simple sentences should come before attempts at longer structures.

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