Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Some people believe telling their children they can achieve anything if they tried hard enough have advantages; whereas some believe these are disadvantagous to children. In this essay we will discuss both benefit and drawback of these behaviour.
On the one hand, telling kids they can achieve enything that they desire with enough work will develop their brain to try different methods until their work is done. If same work is done multiple times there is high chance that, that work will be done from this mindset they will be labourous and will not be lazy if they fail. Moreover, if the activity is completed they will be motivated to do more task this will teach them not to stop from small hurdles. For example: most of the children won't try something if they fail, however, if they tried the same task multiple times they will success no matter how difficult that task is. This habit will help them built a habit of trying until their work is done.
On the other hand, we all know some task are out of our reach. No matter how hard we try these activites are out of our reach, if these messages are given to children they will stuck at unnecessary work and waste their time and effort. Moreover, from this they will be in delusion that everything can be obtain with efforts but respect, trust and love are somethings which are not earn through repetation. For insatance: in love life, if certain person is not interested towards us no matter how good we do for them they will be irrated from us.
In conclusion, giving children message that they can get anything if they tried hard enough provides kids the ability to do task multiple times until work is done and in contrast it also pushes them in delusion that everything is achievable. There are certain things which are far from our reach.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses both advantages and disadvantages and maintains a relevant overall position: persistence can help children overcome setbacks, but the message may also encourage unrealistic expectations. The first body paragraph supports the benefit with the idea that children may keep trying after failure, while the second gives examples of limits involving love and other people’s feelings. These examples show engagement with the task, but some ideas are more fully explained than others. In particular, the claim that repeated effort will ensure success is too absolute, and the discussion of relationships could explain more clearly how children might be taught to distinguish effort from outcomes beyond their control. Develop these points with more balanced reasoning and a clearer qualification of the message.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two sides, and a conclusion that restates the central contrast. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” makes the progression easy to follow, and examples are placed alongside the relevant claims. This meets the lower-band expectations and shows some movement towards more flexible organisation. However, links within sentences are sometimes awkward or unclear, as in “If same work is done multiple times there is high chance that, that work will be done from this mindset.” The conclusion also repeats earlier points rather than drawing them together. Use clearer references and connect each explanation directly to its main claim to make cohesion smoother.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The response uses enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate its main ideas, including “motivated,” “hurdles,” “effort,” and “delusion.” However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make parts of the writing less clear or natural. Examples include “disadvantagous,” “enything,” “labourous,” “repetation,” and “irrated.” Phrases such as “they will success” and “built a habit” also show imprecise word choice or form. Aim to learn vocabulary in accurate phrases, not as isolated words, and proofread spelling carefully. More precise terms for persistence, realistic expectations, and outcomes outside one’s control would help express the argument with greater clarity.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The essay attempts both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “if they tried the same task multiple times” and contrastive clauses beginning “No matter how hard we try.” Meaning is generally recoverable, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur often enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. For example, “telling their children … have advantages” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “they will stuck” and “they will success” use incorrect verb forms. Several sentences also run ideas together without clear punctuation, particularly in the first body paragraph. Practise building accurate clauses first, then combine them with conjunctions and punctuation; check tense and agreement in each sentence.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.