Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Moving to the cities have become a popular trend. people are incresingly choosing to leave their rural lives. While urban population is growing rapidly, rural lives has declined. It offers certain benefits while also creating potential difficulties. This essay will examine the principal advantages and disadvantages of both perspectives of this development before reaching a conclusion about its overall impact.

On the one hand, people are leaving their rural lives for get a better life because cities offer and ensure the quality of education, health, tranportation and good acomodation. In town there are many hospitals, doctors and nurses who taling care of paitaint's health when they have become sick. Furthermore, children get good quality of education in their schools, such as they can learn new skills and languages. Not only children but adult also get the facilities of education. For example, They can go to the colleges and the universities because villages do not give that much facilities of education. Additionally, individuals can enjoy the transport services, enjoy shopping and resturents.

On the other hand, people who think that it is a negetive development because leaving rural live to move urban cities can declined the population of village. As a result, people may face many difficulties, such as in cities population will grow rapidly, have to face transportation's problem, will grow environmental issues and may face problem of shortage of houses and apartments. Concequently, for decreasing population of rural live may face labour problem. As a result, farmer can not grow foo

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both sides of the development by describing access to education, healthcare and transport in cities, then noting urban overcrowding and the loss of rural workers. However, the task asks you to decide whether the change is positive or negative, and your introduction promises a conclusion without stating a clear overall position; the response also ends before that conclusion is given. Several points remain general: for example, you mention that farmers may face labour problems but do not explain the consequences or support this with an example. To strengthen the response, state your judgement clearly and consistently, then develop a few relevant reasons with specific explanations or examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction and separate paragraphs beginning “On the one hand” and “On the other hand.” These markers help readers identify the two perspectives. However, progression within the paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the first paragraph moves quickly from healthcare to education and then shopping, while the second lists several urban problems without explaining their links. Connectors such as “As a result” and “Additionally” are used, but some links are repetitive or do not clearly show cause and effect. The final paragraph also stops mid-thought, leaving the argument without a completed ending. Organise each paragraph around one main claim and explain it before moving to the next point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “quality of education,” “environmental issues,” “shortage of houses” and “labour problem,” so the reader can identify the main subject matter. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making meaning harder to follow. Examples include “rural lives has declined,” “for get a better life,” and “transportation’s problem”; spelling errors such as “incresingly,” “acomodation” and “Concequently” are also noticeable. Aim to learn common phrases as complete units and check spelling carefully. More precise terms for rural depopulation and pressure on city services would help you express the ideas more clearly and flexibly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including “While urban population is growing rapidly…” and “As a result…,” but control is inconsistent. Frequent errors in agreement and verb forms appear in examples such as “Moving to the cities have become,” “rural lives has declined,” and “can declined the population.” There are also problems with infinitive patterns and sentence construction, as in “for get a better life” and “cities will grow rapidly, have to face transportation's problem.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including the lowercase “people” after the opening full stop and “They” after a comma. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and build complex sentences from clear clauses before adding more variety.

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