Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In today's world, migration is major part of individuals lifestyle. However, numerous were been moving one country to onther for better livelyhood and better education and the population of country will be decline. This essay will discuss both the view and then I will give you my opinion.

To commence, in many urban communities nowadays citizens are migrate from one destination to another. In addition, adults are moving to cities due to they got beneficial opportunity to earn more funds and developed their communication skills. Moreover, in the cities there are better transport and hospital available which youngster can easily go on their work and it create positive development . For instance, in the Nadiad majority of many people are going to mumbai in large cities with their couple of family members. Owing to, all the facilities were given in the cities, while in the village are not available. Hence, this reason that the better facilities therefore the country side population will be diminished significantly.

On the other hand, ancient citizen today are not moving their habitat because their have lot of mamories in their place. Furthermore, numerous were trying to live beneficial lifestyle so that they are migration into big cities which all the facilities were been given to pupils for their high-levels of schoold and teachers. Not only for loss their golden memories but also in that place many factories and companies have initiate to developed their products. For example, many individuals when they went to cities for good life therefore adults begin constrution in rural area and started harmful items which affeted detrimetnal to the students and make negative development.

To conclude, In this day and age the technology which were rising at peak levels and may opportunities were given to the youngster to go in cities to growing their skills. Nevertheless, their country population which extramly drop. From my prespective, citizens nowadays have to go in large cities and take experience of new modern culture and their tradition.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address the topic and give a view in the conclusion, saying people should move to cities to gain experience of modern culture. However, the position is not consistently clear: the introduction promises to discuss “both the view,” while the body mixes benefits of urban migration with unclear claims about rural factories and harmful products. Several points, such as better transport, hospitals and education, are relevant, but they are listed rather than explained in relation to whether the overall change is positive or negative. The Nadiad–Mumbai example is also difficult to interpret and does not clearly support a developed argument. State your position directly in the introduction, then select a few relevant reasons and explain their effects with clear examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and signposting such as “To commence,” “On the other hand” and “To conclude” shows an attempt to organise the discussion. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow because the relationship between ideas is often unclear. For example, the second body paragraph moves from older residents’ memories to education, then to factories and harmful products without explaining how these points connect. Some linking phrases are also used inaccurately or mechanically, as in “Owing to” followed by a sentence fragment and “Hence, this reason that.” Improve cohesion by giving each paragraph one clear central point, ordering supporting details logically, and using pronouns and linking expressions only when their references and relationships are clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “migration,” “beneficial opportunity,” “facilities,” “population” and “modern culture,” and you try to vary your wording. However, the range is limited by frequent spelling errors and inaccurate word choice or collocation, which sometimes make meaning difficult to understand. Examples include “livelyhood,” “mamories,” “schoold,” “constrution” and “detrimetnal”; phrases such as “migration is major part of individuals lifestyle” and “country population” are also unnatural. Build accuracy by learning common word partnerships and checking spelling and word forms. Prefer clear, precise expressions over ambitious phrases whose meaning is uncertain, and use vocabulary consistently—for example, distinguish rural areas from cities throughout the essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “which” and “so that.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence construction can make the argument hard to follow. Examples include “citizens are migrate,” “numerous were been moving,” “the population … will be decline,” and “their have lot of mamories.” There are also incomplete or poorly joined constructions, such as “Owing to, all the facilities were given in the cities,” and inconsistent sentence punctuation and capitalisation. Practise forming accurate basic clauses first, then add subordinate clauses while checking subject–verb agreement, tense and articles. Proofread each sentence for a complete, clear grammatical structure.

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