Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Rising community in urban area issue is often viewed as reviewing the population in village life. Major cause of migration is employment and education. In my opinion settling down in other city is a positive development and it have numerous advantages in society.

Primarily, a person who are seeking job and want to complete their education, he is more likely to live in city. Cities have facilities such as educational institutes, hospitals, industries, companies and offices or etc. However some people consider these opportunity to seriously and they are more ambitious to change their lifestyles.

Secondly, students are crucial part of this emigration because they have better career options in cities rather than in villages. For example Ahmad deem was a student who had complete their early education in rural area because he belongs to village. Secondary education in big city of Pakistan (Lahore). During their studies he was also doing part time job which helps him financially. Furthermore, my father also belongs a small village in Sahiwal and he is a first person in their bloodline who had masters degree and he settle his family in a city. Consequently, he is a professional web developer and now my most of the family live in urban area.

Some villager's was totally against education and jobs. Whereas, they were suffering from poorness'. In covid-19 , our government did a survey. Where we can see the main obstacle of countryside downfall. Since, they did not had enough resource of money to afford their basic needs.

In conclusion, i strongly believe that immigrants had a brighter career and they are more likely to be successful than other people still leaving in village and it had a great advantage in development of people's lives because they had facility to be educated and also had an employment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you consider rural-to-urban migration positive, mainly because cities offer employment, education and better prospects. You address the question and support your view with examples, including your father’s move from Sahiwal and his career as a web developer. However, some points are more fully developed than others. The student example is difficult to follow, and the paragraph about villagers’ opposition to education and poverty does not clearly explain how it supports your overall judgement. The claim about a government survey during COVID-19 is also not explained or connected clearly to the issue. To strengthen the response, explain each example’s relevance and develop the benefits and any possible drawbacks more evenly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two supporting paragraphs and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “Primarily,” “Secondly” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of your argument. However, progression is uneven: the paragraph beginning “Some villager’s was totally against education” shifts to poverty and a COVID-19 survey without a clear link to the preceding examples or your positive position. Some connections are also unclear, as in “Whereas, they were suffering from poorness.” Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main point, then connect examples explicitly to it. Clearer referencing and fewer abrupt transitions would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “migration,” “employment,” “educational institutes,” “career options” and “professional web developer.” These choices show an attempt to discuss education and work beyond very basic terms. However, several inaccurate or unnatural expressions make parts of the response difficult to interpret, such as “Rising community in urban area issue,” “reviewing the population in village life,” “consider these opportunity to seriously” and “poorness.” Some word forms and spelling choices are also problematic, including “villager’s” where a plural is intended. Aim for precise, natural collocations and check word forms. For example, use “urban population growth,” “rural population decline,” and “consider these opportunities seriously.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “which” and “who,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, errors in agreement, verb forms, articles and sentence construction are frequent enough to make some sentences hard to read. Examples include “it have numerous advantages,” “a person who are seeking job,” and “he had complete their early education.” The sentence “Secondary education in big city of Pakistan (Lahore)” is incomplete, while “Where we can see…” is also a fragment. Practise building complete sentences and checking subject–verb agreement and tense consistency. For instance, write “It has numerous advantages” and “a person who is seeking a job.”

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