Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

People are going to developed cities is the population is decrease. this is in all world happen.

Yes, the rural area people is moving to citesfor fiding job nad much more. And this is not only in some countries this is all the world. From my prospectives the first things that which is jobs for earn money. Money is those thing which start a circle of life because they buy some food and buy some neccessary thing which is more valuable for life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You identify the general trend—people moving from rural areas to cities—and give a reason, namely the search for work and income. However, the response only minimally addresses the question: it does not clearly say whether this is a positive or negative development, and the ideas about jobs, money, and basic needs are not explained or supported with an example. The response is also substantially below the required 250 words, leaving the argument incomplete. To improve, state your position directly, develop two relevant reasons, and illustrate them with specific consequences or an example, such as the effect on rural services or urban employment.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic attempt to move from the general trend to a reason for it, and the final sentence begins to explain why earning money matters. However, the response has no clear paragraph structure or sustained progression, and the opening sentence is difficult to follow. Connections between ideas are limited; for example, “And this is not only in some countries this is all the world” repeats the global point rather than advancing the argument. Organise the essay into an introduction, developed body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Use clear links to show how each reason supports your view, and avoid repeating the same point.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “rural area,” “cities,” “job,” “earn money,” and “food,” so the basic subject can be recognised. However, the range is narrow and several word choices, forms, and spellings make the message less clear, such as “prospectives,” “neccessary,” and “valuable thing.” Some phrases are also unnatural, including “start a circle of life.” Build a more precise topic vocabulary and learn common collocations, such as “move to urban areas,” “seek employment,” and “meet basic needs.” Check spelling and choose words that express your intended meaning directly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both short statements and a longer sentence explaining the link between income and buying necessities. However, sentence structures are mostly basic, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries frequently make the writing difficult to read. For example, “the population is decrease” needs a correctly formed verb, while “the rural area people is moving” has problems with both the noun phrase and subject–verb agreement. The opening also joins ideas in an unclear way. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine them using clauses such as “because” and “which.” Check each sentence for a clear subject and verb, and use full stops to separate complete ideas.

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