Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Now a days, majority of people migrate from rural to urban areas in different parts of the world in search of better career opportunities and updated lifestyles which, leads to the decrease in population in rural areas.Albeit,this change is quite beneficial to individuals at personal level, yet it offers some drawbacks.I largely believe that this is a negative development and i will support my point of view with the help of examples in the essay below.

As large number of people tend to migrate to cities leaving behind the large acres of land emply.People move to cities,with a vast majority of population already residing.This results in further saturation of cities while resources still being limited such as transportation,employment ,water and electricity.Overconumption of these resources leads to a serious damage to esisting reservoirs in cities.Hence,with the increase in population the demands increase which then contribute to the increase in the cost of living.

Additionally, this mass transfer leads to unequal pressure distribution on cities and regional areas. Large land areas in the villages are left undisturbed from years which can contribute to the loss of natural resources available.lower the population in regionals, lesser is the investment of governemennt in utilising the natural reservoirs.This gap results in cities becoming more and more congested, while rural areas being more baren.Due to this, the rural areas are then neglected for even basic facilities.

In conclusion, I would argue that this relocation of people will end in serious concerns, considering the energy resources ,water and basic facilities in cities.Significant efforts and proper planning is required by government to maintain this balance so that people do not have to run to cities to adjust, grow and compete the world. Effective compaigns can long run projects can be a solution to this matter.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you regard rural-to-urban migration as negative, despite acknowledging personal benefits. You develop relevant consequences, including pressure on city services and the neglect of rural facilities, and the conclusion returns to the need for better planning. This addresses the question, but the two main points are not equally clear or fully supported. For example, the claim that rural land is left unused and natural resources are lost needs a more explicit explanation, since the relationship between fewer residents and resource loss is not established. A specific example or a clearer cause-and-effect explanation would strengthen the argument. The response already shows a clear stance and relevant support; fuller development and more precise reasoning would make it more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and its ideas generally move from urban pressures to rural neglect. Linking expressions such as “Additionally,” “Hence” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. The opening of the first body paragraph, “As large number of people tend to migrate,” is an incomplete construction, and the next sentence repeats the idea of people moving to cities rather than advancing it. In the second body paragraph, the link between low rural population, reduced government investment and loss of natural resources needs clearer sequencing. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main point, then connect each explanation directly to it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “saturation,” “resources,” “congested” and “investment,” which helps communicate the main concerns. There are also some less successful choices and spelling errors that make parts of the argument less precise: “emply,” “Overconumption,” “esisting,” “baren” and “compaigns” are difficult to read, while “updated lifestyles” and “run to cities to adjust” are not natural expressions in this context. Some phrases, such as “unequal pressure distribution,” sound abstract without specifying what pressure is meant. This fits a developing but uneven range: meaning is usually recoverable, yet noticeable errors and collocation problems limit precision. Check spelling carefully and learn common combinations such as “pressure on public services” and “access to better opportunities.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast in “Albeit, this change is quite beneficial … yet it offers some drawbacks” and a cause-and-effect explanation beginning “This results in…”. However, complex constructions are not consistently controlled, and some sentence boundaries and punctuation make the argument harder to follow. For instance, “As large number of people tend to migrate to cities leaving behind the large acres of land emply” is a dependent clause presented as a complete sentence; “which, leads” also has an unnecessary comma. There are errors in articles and agreement, as in “As large number” and “the demands increase,” as well as inconsistent capitalisation of “I.” Practise complete sentence structures and review articles, subject–verb agreement and punctuation while retaining your attempts at varied syntax.

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