Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

in many country around the world rural people are moving to cities after this cities population is increase and countryside is decreasing.my opion on this there is a many positive afect and many negative development. people going to big cities for good jobs and better aducation. in the small villages schools is not good plans. in the small areas only small scools avabline. people did not good earn he only depend on the small salary. in the big cities many of company is avablie and people salary is hight and many of young live is villages of is income. in the cities have big marktings and every thing is good. in the rural areas people not going to park in the cities is have bigs parks. the population not grow in the rural areas many problems creats in this areas. people did not like in this areas. after is areas is attempt of people. many of country face this problme for explame spain pakistan india. and many other country. most of the country is problme is this areas is mountains and the water did not avablme is bigs. after this cities is very growing but cities face more places and more houses and many of roads. government develping inthr rural areas this is the best opion for people and many of the road lineded in this places and many of the schools and have been creat by by the government. this is a good for cities and in this areas.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify relevant reasons for rural-to-urban migration, including employment, education and access to facilities, and you mention examples of countries such as Spain, Pakistan and India. However, the task asks you to decide whether this is positive or negative, and your position is unclear: you say there are “many positive” and “many negative” effects, then conclude that government development in rural areas is “the best option.” The effects on cities and rural communities are mentioned but not explained with clear examples or developed reasoning. The response is also 9 words below the 250-word minimum; the 9 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. State your overall judgement directly, then develop two or three reasons with specific explanations and examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic attempt to move from reasons people leave villages to problems caused by population change and a possible government response. Some links, such as “after this” and “but,” indicate relationships between ideas. However, the response is presented as one long paragraph, and the sequence is difficult to follow: points about jobs, schools, parks, population decline, countries, mountains and roads appear without clear grouping or progression. Several references, including “this areas,” are unclear, and repeated linking phrases do not show precise relationships. Use separate paragraphs for your position, benefits, drawbacks and conclusion. Connect each point explicitly—for example, explain how limited rural schools encourage migration, then show the consequence for villages.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use basic vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “jobs,” “education,” “salary,” “population,” “government” and “roads,” so the general subject can be recognised. However, the range is limited and many words or phrases are repeated, while frequent spelling and word-choice errors make parts difficult to understand. Examples include “good earn,” “big marktings,” “many problems creats” and “the water did not avablme.” Some expressions appear to be attempts at more specific ideas but are not clear to the reader. Build a small set of accurate topic phrases and check spelling and collocations. For instance, use “employment opportunities,” “access to education” and “rural infrastructure” where appropriate, rather than relying on repeated general words such as “good” and “big.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response mainly uses simple statements and makes an attempt to connect ideas, but sentence structures are very limited and errors occur throughout. Subject–verb agreement is often inaccurate, as in “cities population is increase” and “schools is not good”; articles and plurals are also frequently missing or incorrect. Verb forms and sentence boundaries cause further problems, for example in “people did not good earn he only depend on the small salary.” These errors often make the intended meaning hard to follow. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then combine related ideas using “because,” “while” and “as a result.” Check each sentence for a clear subject, a correctly formed verb and appropriate punctuation.

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