Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

With globalisation, various people are migrating from rural areas to metropolis. as in modern times every individual want to attain good level of facilities and they all need further requirements to lead a healthy and prosperous life ahead. However, there are significant drawbacks that affect people if migration is done at greater level. in this essay I will discuss the reason for migration and the environmental challenges that make it more adverse.

One of the key objective of abandoning hometown is for better lifestyles. With technological advancement, variety of amenities are available for resident to live a healthy and prosperous life ahead. No body deserve to spend their life in an area where the life remain unchanged and it serve previous decades look. Additionally, small suburbs are not having any standardise educational institute for youngsters in modern era. Therefore, learners never compromise on their curriculum. Similarly, health institutes are scare in rural areas. It is believed that, people of quiet suburbs are triggering from fatal issues owing to less attention towards treatment of diseases. This has a profound impact in individuals lives.

However, there significant drawbacks of migration. The rising in population often brings congestion in city roads. The most happening and devastating is traffic congestion. This resists people arrive late in any place, either workplace or schools. This dramatically harm to financial conditions. Furthermore, great proportion of citizen can reduce job employments. This results in financial burden. Consecutively, it leads to anxiety and depression among community.

From my own perspective, migration is imperative for people. As, it assist individuals to strengthen their financial arises. Thus, it is imperative to to approach certain strategies to mitigate further issues of resettlement. Authority makers have crucial role to improve particular challenges mentioned in above paragraph.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the reasons for migration and the negative consequences. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention reasons like education and healthcare, the explanation lacks depth and specific examples. The conclusion is a bit abrupt and does not fully synthesise the arguments presented. To improve, ensure that each body paragraph contains a clear topic sentence followed by a well-developed explanation and a concrete example. Your position is clear, but the overall argument would benefit from more nuanced exploration of the 'positive vs. negative' aspect of the development.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Additionally', 'However', and 'Furthermore'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as 'Consecutively' used to mean 'consequently'. There are also instances where the flow between sentences is slightly disjointed, particularly in the introduction and the final paragraph. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring they are used in the correct context will help your writing flow more naturally and improve the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using words like 'globalisation', 'imperative', and 'resettlement'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choices and collocations, such as 'triggering from fatal issues' instead of 'suffering from', and 'authority makers' instead of 'policymakers' or 'authorities'. Some phrases are repetitive, and there are minor errors in word formation (e.g., 'standardise' instead of 'standardised'). To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and ensuring that your vocabulary choices are natural and contextually appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'every individual want', 'health institutes are scare'), missing articles, and incorrect preposition usage. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentences lacking proper capitalisation at the start. These errors are noticeable and occasionally distract the reader, though they do not completely impede communication. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly verb forms and article usage, and try to vary your sentence structures with more precision.

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