Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

People Move to Cities from Villages, and the Population of Villages Decreases. Do You Think This Is a Positive or Negative Development?

Nowadays, this trend is very common in many countries where people move towards urban areas from countryside which leads to decline in rural population. According to my point of view, it is negative development and it creates problems for both villages and cities as well.

First, the most significant reason for people to move towards cities to improve their quality of life. As there are better employment opportunities. Many industries and corporate sector provides job as they always looking forward to recruit educated and skilled personnel. Secondly, quality of education is up to the mark, schools, colleges, universities and vocational institutes are constructed in middle of urban lands which attracts villagers to admit their children for better future. Thirdly, Health sector which plays a pivotal role in human beings life is highly advanced and well equipped

On the other hand, it has detrimental impacts on cities. Urban areas become overcrowded and congested these cause surges in the traffic which leads to poor air quality index. Moreover, public suffers from multiple health related issues such as Obesity, Hypertension as well as Asthma. In addition to these, considerable drop in village populace, drastically effects the agriculture as crops production are plummeted. Furthermore, more land requires for the development of residential areas which has catastrophic effects in terms of climate changes because millions of trees cut down to construct a housing society.

To sum up, declining countryside population has negative impact. Government should take necessary measures to overcome this by providing basic facilities such as education, health, employment that enhances quality of masses in their own home town.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by identifying the trend as a negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you provide reasons for migration (employment, education, health) and consequences (overcrowding, agricultural decline), the argument lacks depth. For instance, the transition between the benefits of migration for the individual and the negative impacts on cities is abrupt. The conclusion is clear, but the supporting points could be more thoroughly extended to reach a higher band. You have successfully covered all parts of the task, but the analysis remains at a surface level, which is characteristic of a Band 6.0 performance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use some cohesive devices such as 'First', 'Secondly', 'Thirdly', and 'On the other hand'. However, the use of these markers is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. Additionally, some transitions are missing or awkward, such as the jump between the benefits of urban life and the negative impacts on cities. The referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and better logical progression to connect your ideas more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'detrimental impacts', 'pivotal role', and 'catastrophic effects'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'in middle of urban lands' (should be 'in urban areas') and 'crops production are plummeted' (should be 'crop production has plummeted'). While these errors do not impede communication, they indicate a limited control over more sophisticated lexical items. To improve, focus on using collocations more accurately and refining your word choices to sound more natural in an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the' health sector, 'the' agriculture), subject-verb agreement ('Many industries... provides job'), and sentence fragments ('Health sector which plays a pivotal role... is highly advanced and well equipped' lacks a main verb or is poorly structured). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar and punctuation prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring every sentence has a clear, complete structure.

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