Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Around the globe,many people from the countryside are moving towards the cities.This has a postive and a negative effect on the economy and the lives of the people.

Firstly,we have to look why the rural people are leaving thier villages and are eager to settle in urban areas.The main reason behind this migration is the lack of resources in the countryside and less oppourtinites as compared to the urban areas.

Rural people are basically attached to the Agricultural Sector and nowadays this sector is suffering from the different kind ofg losses due to the advancement in the technology.Many people are deprived of tthis job as they are replaced by the new technology.As a result,these people intent to move to the urban areas for new jobs and for a better quality of life.

This migration also effects the economy as these people makes the competition more tough to get a job as there are limited number of jobs and the applicants are more.This leads to job losses and the economy sufferes.This also effects different sectors like health,education and many more.The cities can't hold a large number of people so they become overpopulated.

This makes the agricultural sector suffer and weakens the food security'

Now lets talk about the positive factors.The first one is better health and education facilities.Better jobs if they are qualified and they can also work for improving their rural areas.

In my city,there are many people who came here from different rural areas to find a job.Many of them have found a job.Some of them are working as a driver,Cleaner and etc.The ones who are educated secured thier jobs in firms and companies and they are contributing in the economyn of the country.

In my opinoin,the Government should provide basic facilities in the rural areas so in future they don't have to leave thier home for a better future.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of rural-to-urban migration. However, the position is not clearly defined in the introduction, and the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the negative impacts on the economy and agriculture are mentioned, the positive aspects are listed rather than fully explored or supported with detailed reasoning. The conclusion provides a suggestion for the government, which is relevant, but the overall argument lacks a cohesive stance throughout the essay. To improve, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a clear, well-supported main idea that directly relates to your overall position.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally repetitive. For example, the transition between the negative and positive sections is abrupt. There are also issues with punctuation, such as missing spaces after commas and periods, which disrupts the flow of the text. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs more naturally, and ensure that your punctuation is consistent throughout the piece.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their meaning clearly. There are some attempts at topic-specific vocabulary, such as 'agricultural sector' and 'food security'. However, there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'postive', 'thier', 'oppourtinites', 'ofg', 'intent' instead of 'intend', 'economyn', 'opinoin') and some awkward collocations. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic terms. To improve, work on expanding your range of academic vocabulary and pay closer attention to spelling and word choice to ensure precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'these people makes'), incorrect article usage, and punctuation errors. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, particularly subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Proofreading your work for these specific types of errors before finishing will significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.

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