Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the modern era, individuals from rural areas prefer to move in urban cities due to ample of reasons, Because of this the population of the former place have been declined. In my opinion, it is a positive trend as cities offers multiple services to peoples. In this essay we will examine why this is positive trend, will share some reasons before presenting my own experience.

One of the main reasons why this is positive trend is a number of services which cities offers to people. To clarify this, Big cities have better health care, and education facilities which can uplift the living stranded of person life. On the contrary its very difficult to have these service at better level in countryside. Another factor is more job opportunities, People in cities have fair chance to get jobs in order to earn their bread and butter. Therefore, cities helps the individuals to live a better life as compared to rural areas.

There are some reasons why i support this phenomenon, one of them is I used to live in rural side in the past. I struggled hard to achieve my primary education due to lack of schools. Its not only education but other instrumental ares also like better health care which i feel is not that much good as cities. Now am living in city and i can say people who live in urban side have better life as compared to rural.

To sum up, Better facilities and employment are reasons why this positive trend. I firmly agree with this

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the migration is a positive development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention healthcare, education, and employment, these points are explained in a repetitive manner. The personal experience provided is relevant but lacks depth, as it merely restates the points made in the previous paragraph rather than providing a specific, illustrative example. To reach a higher band, ensure that each body paragraph introduces a distinct, well-elaborated point that is fully supported by specific reasoning or examples, rather than simply listing general benefits.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear introduction and conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or repetitive (e.g., 'One of the main reasons', 'Another factor', 'To sum up'). There are also issues with referencing and flow; for instance, the transition between the second and third paragraphs is abrupt. Some sentences are poorly connected, such as 'Its not only education but other instrumental ares also like better health care which i feel is not that much good as cities.' Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward phrasing or incorrect collocations, such as 'ample of reasons', 'living stranded of person life', and 'instrumental ares'. You rely on basic vocabulary to express your ideas. To improve, focus on using more sophisticated collocations and academic vocabulary appropriate for an IELTS essay. For example, instead of 'better life', use 'improved quality of life' or 'enhanced socio-economic prospects'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'cities offers', 'cities helps'), missing articles, and punctuation errors (e.g., 'In the modern era, individuals... prefer to move in urban cities due to ample of reasons, Because of this...'). The use of 'i' instead of 'I' is a recurring error. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and subject-verb agreement.

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