Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is true that in many countries around the world, rural people are moving to urban centers, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. I think it is a negative development because the amount of professional workers in villages are reducing, which hampers the economic conditions, and environmental challenges are increasing.

People go to urban areas because of higher income opportunities and hamper the economic conditions of the villages. This is because they can become friend with rich people and get job offer easily from them. Garments worker, for instance, in Bangladesh may come to Dhaka city, leaving their villages and families, where they work with other professional workers. While leaving for money is beneficial for them to provide financial support to their family, it hampers the economic conditions, and decrease the population of the countryside. Leaving for financial reasons, therefore, should be cancelled out to balance the future population.

Furthermore, I believe city people are damaging the environment conditions more. Having more income resources, they go to cities and largely polluting cities because of industrialization and overcrowding. For example, people are coming in the Seoul city from other countries, and they are creating crowd in the city, which creates pressure on the living homes. Not only do they create pressure on the living homes, but they also do not get enough dustbins for throwing unnecessary items. Consequently, the further conditions of the city environment will become poor.

In conclusion, although people come to cities for the higher income resources, I firmly believe this is negative development because they create imbalance in the population of village, and they also hampering the conditions of cities reducing the air quality.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The student addresses the task by clearly stating their position that the rural to urban migration is a negative development. They provide reasons pertaining to economic impact on villages and environmental issues in cities. However, the argument lacks depth and specific examples relevant to the claims made. To improve, the student should develop their arguments more thoroughly, perhaps discussing potential solutions or counter-arguments, which will provide a more balanced perspective.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, making it relatively easy to follow. However, some transitions between sentences and ideas could be improved for better flow. For example, phrases connecting arguments like "Furthermore" and "Consequently" are present but underutilized. Enhancing coherence could involve using more varied linking phrases to connect thoughts and ideas fluidly and logically.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student demonstrates a fair range of vocabulary, attempting phrases such as "economic conditions" and "polluting cities." However, word choices like "hampering" and "friend with rich people" are awkward and can detract from the overall effectiveness of clarity. The use of more precise vocabulary would strengthen the response significantly, as some phrases are repetitive. The student should aim to incorporate a wider range of synonyms and advanced vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The grammatical range is somewhat limited, with a mix of simple and complex sentences. While there are minor grammatical errors such as "the amount of professional workers in villages are reducing" (should be "is reducing"), the overall meaning remains clear. The student could benefit from varied sentence structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement is consistently correct. Attention to punctuation errors, such as missing commas, would also enhance readability.

Overall feedback

Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and provides a perspective on the negative effects of rural-urban migration. However, to enhance your score, you should expand your reasoning and provide more detailed examples to support your claims, which would improve the task achievement score. Additionally, improving coherence by using a variety of linking phrases can help your ideas flow more smoothly. Work on diversifying your vocabulary as well, opting for more sophisticated word choices and ensuring proper grammatical structures to minimize errors. Consider incorporating a counterargument or addressing potential benefits to create a more well-rounded essay.

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