Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In numerous nation all over the world most of rural natives are moving to the cities due to the big cities have less population so its depends on the people also i can discuss about both view points in the upcoming paragraphs

first and foremost point is that most of the people moving because of environment they have luxuries thing in the cities also a lot of opportunities children can get good education over there . moreover they attract with the culture in the cities has open minded culture people do a lot of things which they want like they can do overnight parties with their friends also can take the decision without ask their parents most of time new generation wants to go outside because of their old culture.afterthat they have good transportation they can go anywhere without any problem because int small area has less sources of transport also they sdapt the new culture where thwy leran the different types of people also enhance the skill thay have overall development

second point is that here are some negative development also where people forget about their roots they left that place where they grew up where they have ancestors memories moreover everyone want to build the carier from outside cities that is why the village could not be any change without new generation for Intance young generation going to other cities but their parents are living in the villages because they don't want to accept the new culture there 30 percent young people left in the small area

To conclude , it has both impact negative and positive also which we cannot be neglected

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both positive and negative aspects of rural-to-urban migration. However, the position is not clearly stated in the introduction, which is a requirement for a higher band. The development of ideas is somewhat superficial; for instance, the point about 'overnight parties' is not a strong or relevant argument for urban migration. The conclusion is very brief and does not effectively summarize the main arguments. To improve, you should ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that your arguments are more focused on the socio-economic impacts of migration rather than personal lifestyle choices.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear structure. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the transitions between ideas are weak or missing. Phrases like 'afterthat' and 'second point is that' are used in a mechanical way. There is a lack of cohesive devices to link sentences, making the flow of ideas disjointed. The referencing is often unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the connection between the '30 percent' statistic and the rest of the argument is confusing. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed idea would significantly improve coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'luxuries thing' instead of 'luxurious amenities' and 'build the carier' instead of 'build a career'. The phrasing is often informal and lacks the precision required for an academic task. Spelling errors are frequent (e.g., 'sdapt', 'thwy', 'leran', 'thay', 'carier'), which occasionally makes the text difficult to follow. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your range of vocabulary and focus on using words that are appropriate for a formal essay context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that impede communication. There is a lack of punctuation, with many run-on sentences and missing full stops, such as in the first paragraph. Subject-verb agreement is often incorrect (e.g., 'cities has open minded culture'). The sentence structures are predominantly simple or poorly constructed complex sentences. There are many missing articles and incorrect verb forms throughout the text. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and practice using correct punctuation to separate distinct ideas.

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