Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.
Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Nowadays, people living in the rural towns are now migrating into the urban areas thereby resulting in lower population in the country side. While this trend offers some merits, it also brings some consequences. However, I personally believe this is largely negative to the environment. This essay will discuss both merit and demerit with my opinion.
On the one hand, the significant advantage of people moving from the communities to the cities is larger number of laborers. When people from the different villages migrate into the cities there will be an increased in the number of people who can perform menial work. This means individuals who are brought up in the city often avoid jobs like construction works and farming so immigrant from country side are always ready and energetic to work.
On the other hand, the reason why I agree that this trend is a negative development is because it will leads to overcrowding in the cities and when there is overcrowding accommodation will become a problem. Therefore, the cities will become dirty and clustered because the land is holding a larger number of people. Furthermore, the rate of unemployment will increase and the number of poor people will also tripled.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you have identified a clear position, the arguments are underdeveloped. For instance, the point about 'menial work' is mentioned but lacks specific examples or a deeper explanation of the socio-economic implications. Furthermore, the essay structure is incomplete; you mention discussing both merits and demerits, but the conclusion is missing entirely. To improve, you must expand on your points with concrete examples and ensure you provide a full conclusion that synthesizes your arguments. The current length prevents a full exploration of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay uses basic cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand' and 'Furthermore' to signal transitions between paragraphs. However, the progression of ideas is somewhat mechanical. The paragraphing is logical, but the lack of a concluding paragraph makes the overall structure feel unfinished. Referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to connect ideas more fluidly rather than relying on simple additive transitions. The essay is coherent, but the lack of a final summary limits the overall cohesion of the piece.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
Your vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You use some relevant terms like 'migrating', 'laborers', and 'overcrowding', but there are instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'clustered' to describe a city and 'tripled' used incorrectly in the context of 'number of poor people will also tripled'. To reach a higher band, focus on using more sophisticated collocations and precise academic vocabulary. Avoid repetitive phrasing and ensure that word forms are used correctly in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For example, 'there will be an increased in the number' should be 'an increase', and 'it will leads to' should be 'it will lead to'. Additionally, 'immigrant from country side' lacks an article and should be pluralized. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors in basic subject-verb agreement and article usage suggests a need for more careful proofreading and practice with sentence construction.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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