Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

A paradigm shift can be witnessed in the count of individuals who think poor peoples migration to urban areas cause population decline in country side area. In my opinion it is a negative approach that I will articulate in the following paragraphs.

To begin with, there are various causative factors that why this is a destructive approach. The most prominent is lose of young and working population. To elaborate it, many younglings move to cities to get better education and job opportunities because of which there are fewer working for agriculture and other rural businesses. For example, many young people leave villages to find jobs in major cities, which can make some villages less developed and less economically active.

Furthermore, an another negative aspect of migration to developed cities is excessive pressure on cities. Elaborating it, more people demand for housing, transport, healthcare and other public services increases. Due to which overcrowding, traffic congestion and higher living costs will increase; moreover, if cities cannot create enough jobs, some migrants may face unemployment or poor living conditions. Consequently, uncontrolled migration can reduce the quality of life for both newcomers and existing residents.

In recapitulation, keeping aforementioned information in mind, it is evident that moving to cities is undoubtedly a negative progression due to lose of workers in rural areas and overcrowding in urban areas.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that rural-to-urban migration is a negative development. However, the response is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which limits the depth of the arguments provided. While the ideas regarding the loss of the rural workforce and the strain on urban infrastructure are relevant, they are somewhat underdeveloped due to the brevity of the response. To reach a higher band, you must expand your supporting points with more detailed explanations and perhaps a more specific real-world example to fully satisfy the task requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'In recapitulation' are used to signal the structure of the argument. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel slightly repetitive. The referencing is generally clear, but the overall progression of ideas could be smoother if the sentences were more varied in length and complexity. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the brevity of the content makes the overall structure feel somewhat thin.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'paradigm shift', 'causative factors', and 'economically active'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'poor peoples migration' (should be 'poor people's migration') and 'lose of young' (should be 'loss of young'). Additionally, the phrase 'younglings' is not standard academic English. To improve, focus on using more precise terminology and ensuring that word forms (e.g., 'loss' vs 'lose') are used correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'there are various causative factors that why this is' (redundant phrasing), 'an another negative aspect' (incorrect article usage), and 'Due to which overcrowding... will increase' (fragmented sentence structure). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and avoiding redundant structures will help improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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