Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In modern time, Significant proportion of population around world migrating from rural areas toward cities that's why population start decreasing in country-side area. However it have numerous of cons which effect both residents and country. Furthermore, we will discuss in this this essay the effect of over population on cities. Althought some drawbacks will also shown on rural areas.

To begin with, one significant drawback is that these days, cities day by day becoming over populated due to a large amout of people are migrating toward cities from villages that's why scarcity of job is produced for eveyone. It also effect the resources due over population like,( health, education, security and funds ). Although some how it also effect the environment. The most crital thing is that it effect very badly to country.

Moreover, on the other side it also shows numerous negative effect on country side just agricuture which are economical very important for country and its population. In addition, they also leave their roots. Because of this villages are becoming depopulation and looking like a desert because they do not doing any farming on their lands, that effect is showing on eveything on wheather, on country and manily on people.

In conclusion, according to many reports in many countries widely people living the rural ares and shifting in cities and that is causing lot of deficulties for eveyone and it also have negative effect on both side we need to countrol this. It have fatal effect on people's specially and also on country economical. Although it will to difficult to govenment to manage eveyone in cities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by identifying the migration as a negative development. However, the development of ideas is limited and repetitive. While you mention the impact on cities (scarcity of jobs, resource strain) and rural areas (loss of agriculture, depopulation), the arguments lack depth and specific examples. The essay tends to over-generalise, and the position, while clear, is not fully supported with well-developed reasoning. To improve, you should focus on expanding each point with a concrete example or a more detailed explanation of the causal links between rural-to-urban migration and the specific problems mentioned.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often disjointed. While you use some cohesive devices like 'To begin with' and 'Moreover', they are often used mechanically or incorrectly (e.g., 'Furthermore, we will discuss in this this essay...'). There are issues with referencing; for example, the phrase 'that effect is showing on eveything' is vague and does not clearly link back to previous ideas. The flow between sentences is frequently interrupted by grammatical errors, which makes the overall structure feel somewhat disjointed and repetitive.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The range of vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'effect', 'country', and 'people' throughout the text. There are several instances of incorrect word choice and collocation, such as 'numerous of cons', 'scarcity of job is produced', and 'they do not doing any farming'. Spelling errors are frequent (e.g., 'Althought', 'crital', 'eveything', 'deficulties', 'govenment'), which occasionally forces the reader to pause to understand the intended meaning. To reach a higher band, you need to use a wider range of vocabulary and ensure that words are used in their correct grammatical context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors that impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'population start decreasing', 'it effect very badly'), missing articles, and incorrect sentence structures (e.g., 'In modern time, Significant proportion...'). Complex sentence structures are attempted but are almost always flawed, leading to confusion. Simple sentences are also frequently inaccurate. To improve, you must focus on basic sentence construction, specifically ensuring that subjects and verbs agree and that articles are used correctly. Reducing the number of errors is essential before attempting more complex grammatical structures.

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