Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In numerous countries worldwide, citizens from the rural areas are migrating to the urban areas, which results in the decline of the public in the countryside. Although some people might consider it positive, I believe it to be extremely negative. It is a negative change because it causes several issues, such as pollution and drop of a country`s economy. On the positive side, people receive many facilities in cities, which lead them to live a better life. These facilities include better job opportunities, more business options, improved healthcare system, and quality education for their children. Therefore, many individuals argue that migration of people from countryside to cities is a favourable approach. However, I personally believe that it is a negative change for some reasons, Firstly, pollution, especially air pollution which caused by huge traffic, congestion and industrial works, is one of the leading drawbacks of this development. When more than enough population lives in a city, they use vehicles and work in industries which results in the damage of environment because they release more noise and make the air polluted. For instance, Mumbai and Lahore both cities have more citizens than their capacity which results that they are most polluted cities in the world. Secondly, this change brings challenges in the path of economic growth of a country. Agriculture sector is a major contributor in GDP of any country, if fewer people stay in the countryside, this sector will face huge decline because there were no enough workers for care of fields. To illustrate, Japan experienced this change in 1988, and in 1999, they conducted a survey which revealed that their GDP was dropped by 3%, because agriculture sector was almost finished due to this development. In conclusion, although this development has some advantages, I largely argue that it is a negative development because its disadvantages in terms of harmful environment and decline in the economic growth are more significant. Therefore, this is a negative development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task and maintains a clear position throughout. You acknowledge the benefits of urbanization before arguing that the negative impacts on the environment and the agricultural economy are more significant. The ideas are relevant and supported with examples, such as the mention of Mumbai and Lahore regarding pollution, and the reference to Japan's agricultural decline. To reach a higher band, ensure that the development of ideas is more balanced; the counter-argument regarding urban facilities is slightly brief compared to the main arguments. Overall, the response is well-focused and directly answers the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', 'To illustrate', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the transition between the benefits of city life and the negative impacts could be more sophisticated. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. The referencing is generally clear, though some minor improvements in the use of linking words would enhance the overall cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'migrating', 'urbanization', 'drawbacks', and 'economic growth'. There are some instances of slightly unnatural phrasing, such as 'decline of the public' instead of 'decline in the rural population' or 'drop of a country's economy'. You attempt to use less common vocabulary, but there are occasional inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and ensure that your word choices are consistently natural in an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you successfully use complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'which caused by' (should be 'which is caused by'), 'results that they are' (should be 'resulting in them being'), and 'there were no enough workers' (should be 'there are not enough workers'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some minor errors. The errors do not impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Increasing the variety of error-free complex structures will help improve this score.

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