Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

As rural area as backward area and facilities of life is not available as hospital with big machinary and every field doctor and educational institues.

People want to life where they can asses everything they move to the cities. For higher education univerties is available in villages and if any person with sever condition of health doctors are not available and causes death of many people because of distant cities . the positive impact is that the more educated and source to income increase and where only father doing work and carry all the responsibilities children after education carry their ficnancial support their own the responsibilities divided life of parents became easy when became older becuase of independed children.

And the agriculture that is only field in village to earn money and its not worth it because the hardwork not pay as much farmer do work on crops and industries buy at very low rate that why people want to run buisness in cities after moving from country side.

The negative impact of that food producation decrease day by day as passage of time population increase and population going toward hunger and increase the population in cities every field overrushed and not every one get the jobs that became more problematic for peple who have no source of income then job or job with less income t

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response attempts to address the prompt by discussing both positive and negative aspects of rural migration to cities, but it falls short of fully developing a coherent position. Furthermore, the task requires a minimum of 250 words, and this response contains only 227 words. This under-length issue prevents the candidate from fully exploring the prompt. While some relevant ideas are introduced, such as better educational and medical facilities in cities alongside the decline in agricultural production, these points remain limited and underdeveloped. The position on whether this is a positive or negative development is blurred because the text presents a list of fragmented observations rather than a structured argument. Therefore, the task achievement is constrained by both word count and depth of development.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The structural progression of the essay is significantly hindered by faulty paragraphing and a lack of cohesive devices. The response lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Sentences are frequently strung together without appropriate conjunctions or transitional markers, as seen in 'People want to life where they can asses everything they move to the cities.' The lack of clear referencing and punctuation makes it difficult for the reader to follow the logical progression of ideas. Although there is a loose grouping of positive impacts followed by negative impacts, the overall arrangement lacks logical coherence, leading to a confusing reading experience.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, struggling to meet the demands of an academic task. Words and phrases like 'backward area', 'big machinary', and 'source to income increase' demonstrate a limited range. There are also numerous word choice and collocation errors, such as 'sever condition of health', 'ficnancial support', and 'overrushed'. Spelling mistakes are frequent, including 'institues', 'asses', 'sever', 'ficnancial', 'independed', 'buisness', and 'producation'. These lexical limitations and errors occasionally impede communication, requiring the reader to guess the intended meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

Grammatical control is weak throughout the response. The text consists almost entirely of flawed, run-on complex sentences or fragments, with very few accurate, simple structures. Examples of severe grammatical errors include 'As rural area as backward area and facilities of life is not available', 'univerties is available', and 'the hardwork not pay as much farmer do work on crops'. Punctuation is largely neglected, with missing periods and commas creating confusing multi-line sentences. The frequency of errors in basic subject-verb agreement, tense usage, and sentence structure heavily strains comprehension and places this in the lower band range.

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