Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In many countries of the world, the population of rural area is decreasing due to people of this area are moving to cities. Although some might consider it positive, I believe it to be extremely negative. Not only because of unemployment and shortage of housing, but also because of shortage of food.

There are multiple disadvantage associated with this issue. Firstly, unemployment can be considered as the leading disadvantage of this development. As more people come cities so enough worker are available for work. Take an example, the government of China, faced a problem of unemployment in 1999, because the people of rural area moved in the cities. Thus, this mega disadvantage I believe has the potential to make this development a negative development.

Secondly, apart from unemployment, shortage of housing can also be another major disadvantage of this problem. As people of rural area moved in the cities so the people face the problem of shortage of house. For instance, a survey conduct in Japan, almost 80 percent people said their face the problem of shortage of housing because more people come in cities from the countryside. Hence, shortage of housing can be labelled as the most significant disadvantage, giving this development a negative outlook.

Finally, Shortage of food can also be considered a leading disadvantage of this problem. As more citizen moved into cities so the farming also be effective.

To sum up, even though moving in cities might have some benefit too, but I believe that the disadvantage it bring in term of unemployment, shortage of housing and shortage of food can make this development an overall negative one,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The student addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position that the rural-to-urban migration is a negative development. The body paragraphs attempt to provide reasons for this stance, focusing on unemployment, housing shortages, and food shortages. However, the development of these ideas remains limited and repetitive. For instance, the claims regarding food shortages and unemployment are stated rather than adequately extended or supported with convincing evidence. The examples provided, such as the mention of China in 1999 or a survey in Japan, lack specific context and depth, falling into over-generalisation. Furthermore, the final paragraph cuts off abruptly with a comma instead of a period, leaving the conclusion incomplete. Overall, the task is addressed, but the ideas require deeper elaboration and more rigorous support to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay demonstrates an attempt at logical organisation through the use of transition markers such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'To sum up'. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by repetitive phrasing and awkward cohesion. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and cohesive devices are used mechanically rather than flexibly. Paragraphing is present with an introduction, three body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which provides a basic overall structure. Nevertheless, the final sentence of the conclusion is incomplete due to a punctuation error (ending in a comma), which disrupts the overall coherence. The transitions between sentences can feel abrupt, and the ideas lack a smooth, natural flow from one point to the next, placing this response firmly in the Band 5.0 to 5.5 range.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses a basic and repetitive vocabulary range suitable for describing the topic in general terms, employing words like 'development', 'disadvantage', 'shortage', and 'problem' frequently. There are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward word choices throughout the text, such as 'people of this area' instead of 'rural populations', and 'farming also be effective' instead of 'agricultural production will be negatively affected'. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey the core message about urbanisation, the lack of flexibility and the presence of word-choice errors that occasionally strain comprehension limit the score to a Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and flawed attempts at complex clauses. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the response, including subject-verb agreement issues ('people of rural area moved in the cities'), missing articles ('face the problem of shortage of house'), and incorrect prepositions ('a survey conduct in Japan'). The majority of sentences contain noticeable errors that cause difficulty for the reader and impede fluent reading. Additionally, punctuation errors are present, most notably the incomplete final sentence ending in a comma. These persistent grammatical inaccuracies reflect the descriptors for Band 5.0.

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