Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

People's movement from rural areas toward cities has both negative and positive effects on societies. Rural areas are more healty for living as compared to cities. The garbages and less planted areas are specially found in cities which can cause numerous diseases and affect a good lifestyle while rural areas are more better places for fresh air, fresh water and clear environment. People living in rural areas are more strong through farming and then through healthy foods while cities are more familier to junk food and dingy workplace environments. Rural reigions are more better than cities but people living in cities have more opportunities than the rural people. As by the migration recorded statements of rural people migrating towards cities describe the cuses as seeking better opportunities for employments and developing a better future for ther next geneation to educate them and give them a better environment (as they think) for a good professional life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

Your response sits at this level because the length requirement is not met, as your text contains only 155 words compared to the minimum requirement of 250 words. Furthermore, you respond to the task only minimally. While you briefly touch upon both negative and positive aspects of urban migration, such as environmental conditions and employment opportunities, your ideas remain limited and under-developed. For instance, you state that rural areas are 'more better for fresh air' and mention migration causes for employment, but you fail to extend these points with sufficient explanations or relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. To improve, you must write a fully developed essay meeting the word count and providing thorough arguments for each side of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

Your text shows some organisation, but it lacks a clear overall progression. The writing is presented as a single paragraph rather than being structured into a proper introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which makes the logical sequence difficult to follow. Additionally, cohesive devices are inadequate and repetitive, relying heavily on basic conjunctions like 'and', 'then', and 'as' to link ideas. For example, sentences such as 'People living in rural areas are more strong through farming and then through healthy foods' demonstrate faulty referencing and a lack of smooth transitions between thoughts. To reach a higher band, you need to organise your response into distinct paragraphs and use a wider, more accurate range of cohesive devices to guide the reader clearly through your arguments.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary range is limited but minimally adequate for the task. You attempt to use less common items, but this results in noticeable errors in word choice, collocation, and word form that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. For example, terms like 'healty', 'garbages', 'familier', 'reigions', and 'dingy workplace environments' show frequent inaccuracies. Furthermore, comparative forms are incorrectly constructed, such as 'more better' and 'more strong', which reflect a basic lexical control. To achieve a higher score, you should build a broader vocabulary repertoire, pay closer attention to natural collocations and word forms, and carefully check your spelling before finishing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

Your grammar is characterised by a limited range of structures, consisting mostly of basic sentences where attempts at complexity often become faulty. There are frequent errors in verb forms, articles, plurals, and prepositions inside grammatical patterns that can cause difficulty for the reader. For instance, phrases like 'the population in the countryside are decreasing' show agreement issues, and 'ther next geneation to educate them' contains spelling and structural errors. Punctuation is also weak, as the entire response essentially consists of very long, run-on sentences joined by conjunctions. To improve your grammar score, you should practise writing shorter, clearer sentences, incorporate a variety of accurate complex structures, and monitor your use of articles and plurals closely.

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