Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is an undeniable fact that nowadays the state-of-the-art era has various opportunities of offer to the public residing at the urban areas. Around the globe, folks from villages are shifting to the cties in search of better opportunties, affecting the population in the rural areas. Though decline in the number of people living the countryside cannot be ignored but also the better career prospects offered by cityside cannot be unseen. I throughly believe this as a positive development and the reasons for the same will be articulated in the forth coming paragraphs.

To start with, the major reason for the shift in the population of people from rural areas to urban areas award goes to the ample of oppurtunities offered by various cities. In can be undeniably stated that as compared to the employment in coutryside, there are various career finds for folks in the city. For instance, the emplyment opportunity in village areas are only limited to working in farm lands or grazing the farm animals nearby though one has a good catch in studies but due to lack of future options to explore people tend of shift their living in the urban areas to make better career. Apart from better future; cities also offer a good standard of living as compared to the one's in countrysides. People in the cities have various entertainment sources to keep themselves rejuvinated from the work load such as cinema's, huge shopping centres, luxurious salon's to relax making rural people attract to this facilities stands as a paragon here.

Secondly, urban centres have better education system and great medical servies to offer and this might be the another reason for the people living in villages to shift in cities. For exampe, people in the rural areas have to travel all the way from village to a metro city to get cured when a huge medical emergency occurs. Moreover, as compared to cities villages have less schools and hospitals making people dislike thier own village and dreaming about moving to a big city for better education and good hospitality. Even schools in the rural areas offer limited education whereas, the one's in the cities have various options to study from making another reason for the migration of people from rural to urban areas.

On the close scrutiny, it can be concluded that although rural life has a peacefull living but it can never match the opportunities and the luxurious standard of living offered by cities throughtout the nation. A decline in the population in rural areas might take place but it's for the best for the people as migrating from countryside to city offers various aspects of life such as better education, medical services and career as comapred to the rural areas.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your response addresses all parts of the task by clearly presenting a position that the movement of rural people to cities is a positive development, and you support this with relevant ideas. However, certain aspects are more fully developed than others, which places your response at this level. While you successfully discuss career prospects, lifestyle benefits, and better education and medical services, some of these ideas feel slightly repetitive or under-developed. For instance, your discussion on healthcare could have been extended with more specific examples rather than general statements. To reach a higher band, you need to extend and fully develop all of your main ideas with deeper elaboration and robust supporting evidence throughout the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

Your essay has a coherent overall arrangement and a clear progression, using introductory and concluding paragraphs to frame your argument. You successfully employ basic cohesive devices such as 'To start with', 'Secondly', and 'On the close scrutiny' to signal the structure of your essay. Nevertheless, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, and referencing can occasionally be unclear. For example, some transitions feel forced or repetitive, and referencing pronouns do not always clearly point back to their antecedents. To move to a higher band, you should ensure that cohesive devices are used more flexibly and unobtrusively, and that paragraphing manages transitions between ideas with greater fluidity and precision.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task and make clear attempts to use less common items, such as 'state-of-the-art', 'rejuvinated', and 'paragon'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice errors throughout your text, including 'otn' instead of 'on', 'cities' spelled as 'cties', 'opportunties', 'throughly', 'coutryside', 'oppurtunities', 'emplyment', 'servies', 'exampe', and 'peacefull'. These errors, alongside slightly unnatural collocations like 'career finds' or 'ample of oppurtunities', indicate a limitation in lexical control. To achieve a higher band, you need to expand your vocabulary range while improving spelling accuracy and ensuring that less common phrases are used with natural collocation and precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You display a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting various multi-clause structures to present your arguments. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, such as article omissions, pluralisation inconsistencies like 'luxurious salon's', and awkward prepositional patterns within your sentences. For instance, phrases like 'making rural people attract to this facilities' contain errors in voice and prepositional use. However, these errors rarely impede communication and the meaning remains clear to the reader. To reach a higher band, you must increase the proportion of error-free complex sentences and demonstrate a tighter control over grammatical patterns, subject-verb agreement, and punctuation.

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