Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

People living in rural areas all around the world are increasingly moving to cities, making rural areas less densely populated.

I contend that a huge number of people moving to cities is not a positive point due to it’s effects on both rural areas which would have a decline in their services and cities which would be overcrowded.

One of the main reasons this development is considered negative is that rural areas lose a significant proportion of workers particularly young people. As the inhabitants of those rural areas move to cities, the countryside can become increasingly sparsely populated and have fewer employees available for different sectors and local businesses leading to a significant decline in local services. For instance, the decline in the young population can lead to the closure of businesses that cater to younger residents, such as cafés, gift shops and clothing stores.

One more reason why this phenomenon is negative is the pressure that cities may experience. The rapid growth of urban populations can lead to overcrowding,traffic congestion, housing shortages, as urban infrastructure may not be able to accommodate the increasing number of residents. This can place additional pressure on public transport and essential services, while the high demand of housing can lead to higher rent costs and make accommodation less affordable. For instance, large cities that attract significant number of migrants may struggle to have housing and transport facilities for their expanding population. In addition, this development can contribute to increase the risk of problems such as theft , sexual harassment and sometimes crime rates.

To conclude, although moving to larger cities can be beneficial for several people and provide them with employment opportunities, I believe that the decline of rural populations is a negative development because it put more pressure on cities and make rural communities weaker and more neglected.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully addresses all parts of the task by clearly stating a position that the rural-to-urban shift is a negative development. The ideas are relevant and generally well-presented, covering both the decline of services in the countryside and the overcrowding in cities. However, certain parts exhibit the characteristics of this band level because some ideas are slightly under-developed or rely on broad generalizations. For instance, the claim regarding an increase in specific crimes like sexual harassment at the end of the third paragraph is introduced abruptly without sufficient elaboration or local context. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to fully extend and support all arguments with deeper analysis or more specific real-world examples rather than concluding points prematurely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance established in the introduction and reinforced in the conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately, dividing the response logically into an introduction, two distinct body paragraphs focusing on separate issues, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are employed to guide the reader through the text, such as 'One of the main reasons' and 'One more reason why this phenomenon is negative'. Nevertheless, cohesion occasionally feels slightly mechanical, and referencing between ideas can sometimes lack complete smoothness. To progress further, the writer should aim for a more sophisticated and flexible integration of cohesive phrases, ensuring that transitions between sentences and paragraphs flow entirely naturally without relying on formulaic introductory markers.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating central ideas about urbanization, population density, and infrastructure. There are clear attempts to incorporate less common lexical items such as 'sparsely populated', 'infrastructure', and 'employment opportunities'. However, minor inaccuracies in word choice and phrasing prevent a higher rating, such as the punctuation error in 'due to it’s effects' (where 'its' should be possessive) and slight awkwardness in phrasing like 'contribute to increase the risk'. Spelling and word choice are generally sufficient to ensure communication is not impeded, but achieving a higher band would require a wider, more flexible range of sophisticated vocabulary used with precise collocation and complete accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over multi-clause structures such as 'As the inhabitants of those rural areas move to cities, the countryside can become increasingly sparsely populated...'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including missing articles or minor prepositions, but they rarely impede communication. The punctuation around clauses and items in a list occasionally lapses, such as the spacing before commas in phrases like 'theft , sexual harassment'. To move higher up the scale, the writer needs to produce a greater frequency of error-free complex sentences and exhibit tighter control over punctuation and grammatical agreement throughout the entire response.

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