Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In numerous countries around the globe, people from the country side are moving to cities, so the population is decreasing, I think this has a negative development since it can cause overpopulation. and empty the countryside.

To begin with, we have to study the root of the problem of why people leave the countryside, in some developing countries with a low instrufracture and human development index, the capital of the state is the center of attraction, job opportunites and a high quality life. therfore you can find many individuals leaving to achieve a better future and present. Each state has its problems , for instance a study was made in the rural parts of Ghana found that 98% percent of the people would prefer to live in the outskirts of France than in Ghana. So the issue isn't just about rural people or rural areas.

Furthermore, what people want in these areas is a high quality level of life for them and their kids. So we have to think to make their lives easier and with the same quality of those in major cities. from my knowledge asking my friends who used to live there, they said that if they had better services and chances, they wouldn't have came to Cairo. So what happens to big cities that they become overpopulated and the countryside becomes abandoned which leads to having unbalanced population in one state which makes the state's instrafracture not able to keep up with such population, services become worse and pressure on job opportunites.

In conclusion, I firmly believe having a solid countryside as good as the big cities will solve the problem. Goverments should pay attention to these areas equally.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the task partially by presenting a clear position that urban migration is a negative development due to overpopulation and the abandonment of the countryside. However, the development of ideas is limited and sometimes tangential. For instance, the discussion in the second paragraph shifts towards a statistical study in Ghana and the outskirts of France, which is confusing and lacks clear connection to the central argument. While you introduce relevant thoughts regarding government support and infrastructure, some points remain under-developed, preventing the response from achieving full depth and extension.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

There is some organisation in the essay, with paragraphs used to separate introduction, body points, and conclusion. However, there is no clear overall progression throughout the text. Cohesive devices are sometimes inaccurate, repetitive, or mechanically applied, such as the excessive use of 'so' and 'therfore' to link clauses. Furthermore, referencing can be unclear, such as the abrupt transition in the second paragraph starting with 'Each state has its problems', which disrupts the logical flow between sentences and makes the sequencing of ideas feel disjointed at times.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to communicate the basic ideas. There are noticeable lexical errors, such as spelling mistakes ('instrafracture', 'opportunites', 'Goverments'), misuse of word forms ('a high quality life' instead of 'a high quality of life'), and slight oddities in collocation that require the reader to occasionally pause. While you attempt some less common vocabulary items like 'human development index' and 'overpopulated', these errors and a reliance on simple, repetitive words restrict the lexical range and precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

There is a limited range of structures demonstrated in the writing. The text relies heavily on simple sentences and run-on sentences joined improperly with commas, such as the opening sentence: '...population is decreasing, I think this has a negative development...'. Attempts at complex sentences are often faulty, featuring frequent errors in article usage, subject-verb agreement, and verb forms, such as 'they wouldn't have came to Cairo'. These frequent grammatical errors cause some difficulty for the reader and reflect a restricted command of sentence patterns.

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