Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Rural to urban migration has been witnessed in recent days. A considerable number of people are moving to cities, as a result population declines in up country, and population surge in urban centres. In my opinion, demographic decrease in rural areas leads to reduction in food production, thus this trend is a negative development.

Migrating to urban setting bring several challenges. To begin with decline in food production. Countrysides dominate as food baskets, that feeds both people residing in towns and rural areas. When people shift the residence to major towns would automatically results to shortage of labour, therefore people working in farms would not generate surplus foods to sustain a larger population. For instance food prices sky rocket due to high demand compared to scarcity of food stuffs.

Another challenge posed by rural to urban migration is shortage of apartments in cities. Several major cities are faced with residential issues. When there is a surge in population, a few people would acquire accomodation. This trend has left many people in deplorable slums. Slums is associated with outbreak of contagious diseases such as cholera and typhoid, thus several deaths are encountered. Moreover, house rent will be up the roof and young vibrant people would not make ends meet.

In conclusion, rural people moving to cities to seek improve living standards is a positive trend, though it creates several challenges compared to advantages, not limited to shortage of food and outbreak of diseases. This trend would be beneficial only when people move to towns with one foot at rural homes.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the task partially, presenting a clear position that the trend is a negative development based on food production reduction. However, the ideas remain somewhat limited and under-developed. While the introduction states that the trend leads to reduced food production and urban population surges, the body paragraphs struggle to fully expand on these points. For instance, the discussion on food prices and urban housing shortages touches on relevant concepts, but the explanations are brief and lack fully extended supporting examples. Additionally, the conclusion contradicts the main body and the stance taken in the introduction by stating that moving to cities is a 'positive trend,' which makes the overall position slightly unclear at the end. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to maintain a consistent position throughout and fully develop each main idea with sustained explanation and richer examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay displays some overall organization with clear paragraphs, but it lacks a clear progression of ideas throughout. Cohesive devices are sometimes used mechanically or inaccurately, such as 'To begin with decline in food production,' which lacks proper grammatical integration. Referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in the phrase 'When people shift the residence to major towns would automatically results to shortage of labour,' where the connection between clauses feels disjointed. Paragraphing is attempted, with distinct sections for the introduction, body challenges, and a conclusion, but the flow between sentences within paragraphs can be choppy. To improve, the writer should use more natural cohesive links, ensure unambiguous referencing, and build stronger logical bridges between sentences to secure a smooth progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'surplus foods,' 'deplorable slums,' and 'contagious diseases.' However, there are noticeable errors in word choice, collocation, and word form throughout the text. Examples include 'population declines in up country' instead of the countryside, 'shift the residence' instead of shifting residence, 'accomodation' with a spelling error, and the phrase 'house rent will be up the roof' instead of through the roof. Additionally, the confusion in the conclusion regarding 'improve living standards' versus the negative stance causes some awkwardness. Despite these inaccuracies, the vocabulary is minimally adequate and meaning is generally communicated. To achieve a higher band, the writer needs to use less common vocabulary with greater precision, improve collocation control, and eliminate spelling and word-form errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control over grammar is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in verb forms, tense consistency, and subject-verb agreement, such as 'population declines in up country, and population surge in urban centres' and 'automatically results to shortage of labour.' Article usage is also problematic in phrases like 'decline in food production' and 'shortage of apartments.' Furthermore, sentence structures often break down, as seen in 'Slums is associated with outbreak of contagious diseases.' These errors require some effort from the reader to parse the exact meaning. To progress, the writer must focus on reducing basic grammatical errors, ensuring correct subject-verb agreement, mastering prepositions within grammatical patterns, and producing more error-free complex sentences.

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