Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Individuals in various countries are shifting to the urban areas from villages around the globe, thats way population in the rural areas is falling rapidly. It is issue of concern in the contemporary era because if the number of individuals living in the suburb decreases, there will be a cradle of civilization in cities which will be dificult to manage.In this essay, i will demonstrate the negative impacts of this movement with example.

First of all, if a great sheer of population move to a city for better facilities and lifestyle, there will be a shortage of living spaces in the city which further rais major issues like the lack of housing societies. For instance, if dozens of families move to a city, they will burdenize people akready living there.

Secondly, there will be scarcity of farmers and workers who work in fields which in turn cause lower yield. For example shortage of food or starvation conditions emerged.

Thirdly, there will be overwhelming condition in cities like confined spaces, people will be likely to survive in small spaces which in result cause rise in conflicts among them. There will be health hazards also because the rise in population level poses risk to current sanitation conditions like hardness of table water, rise in temperature, more emission of green house gases and noise pollution.

In conclusion, As population rises, there will be more exploitation of resources and higher in unemployment ratio because competition escalates among them. The challenge is to provide facilities like transport network, hospitals, schools and colleges; which are responsible for the migration of rural people to cities. It is the duty of officials to provide complete commodities to them to stop further movement.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you consider rural-to-urban migration negative, and you give relevant reasons, including pressure on housing, fewer agricultural workers, and overcrowding and pollution in cities. The conclusion also proposes improving rural services to reduce migration, which responds to the issue. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, the claim that fewer farmers will cause “shortage of food or starvation” needs a clearer link or a specific example. The discussion of water quality, temperature, emissions, and noise also introduces several effects without developing them. To strengthen the response, explain the consequences of each main reason in more detail and support at least one with a concrete example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, three body paragraphs signposted with “First of all,” “Secondly,” and “Thirdly,” and a conclusion. This makes the overall line of argument easy to follow. Some connections between ideas are less clear, however. In the first paragraph, “there will be a cradle of civilization in cities” does not clearly express the intended consequence, and the link between rural population decline and city pressures could be stated more directly. The third body paragraph combines overcrowding, conflict, sanitation, climate, emissions, and noise, so its focus becomes diffuse. Group related effects and use clearer references and transitions to show how each point follows from migration.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “shortage of living spaces,” “scarcity of farmers,” “sanitation conditions,” and “exploitation of resources.” However, several inaccurate or unnatural choices make parts of the argument difficult to interpret. “A great sheer of population,” “burdenize,” and “hardness of table water” are not appropriate expressions in these contexts; “a large number of people,” “put pressure on,” and “water quality” would be clearer. There are also spelling errors such as “dificult,” “akready,” and “rais.” Aim for precise, natural collocations rather than using complex-sounding phrases, and proofread spelling and word forms. This would make your ideas more accessible and demonstrate more reliable control of vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple statements and longer conditional or cause-and-effect sentences, such as “if a great sheer of population move to a city… there will be a shortage” and “As population rises, there will be more exploitation of resources.” This shows some structural variety, but errors in sentence construction and punctuation sometimes interrupt the flow. For example, the opening sentence joins two clauses with a comma, and “if … population move” has a subject–verb agreement problem. Capitalisation is inconsistent in “i” and “As” after the conclusion marker, while several sentences run together without appropriate spacing or punctuation. Work on accurate clause boundaries, agreement, articles, and sentence punctuation, then check each sentence aloud to ensure its grammatical relationships are clear.

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