Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Although cities becoming more and more populated in recent decades, while the inhabitants in countryside have diminished day by day. I think, the advantages of this trend out weigh the disadvantages.

On the one hand, the biggest benefit of moving to cities is plenty of facilities. As compares to rural areas,there are less job oppurtunities. People living a difficult life with less income. For example, majority of individuals have moved to big cities to improve their life styles and they becomes successfull by providing better employment and good medical and educational facilities, furthermore it is also beneficial for our economy.

However, there are some disadvantages of migration of people. It can affect our agriculture profit, because our economy is mostly rely on agricultural goods such as floor and rice. As more people has move to cities the more cultivation could be affected. Moreover overcrwoding is also the biggest problem in cities, which can cause traffic congestion and contamintion. However these problems can be adressed if government invest in rural development; for instance, they could improve school, college, hopitals, roads and internet facilities in villages. In adittion providing financle support to farmers and encourging businesses to opertae in rural areas could create more local employment opportunities.

In conclusion, although moving to cities can offer better career and educational prospects, I consider decline in rural population is a negative development overall. Government should improve rural infrastruture and employment opportunties to achieve a better balance between rular and urban communties

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You present a position—that the trend is negative overall—and give relevant reasons on both sides, including access to jobs and services, reduced agricultural production, and urban overcrowding. However, the response does not fully develop these points: the example of people becoming successful is general, and the link between rural depopulation and harm to agriculture needs clearer explanation. Your conclusion is consistent with your view, but the essay gives limited support for why the disadvantages outweigh the benefits. The response is also three words below the required minimum. To strengthen the answer, explain one or two effects in more detail and add a specific, relevant example to support your judgement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph presenting benefits, a paragraph discussing disadvantages and possible solutions, and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the overall argument. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, particularly where the discussion moves from employment and facilities to economic benefits without explaining the connection. Linking expressions such as “On the one hand,” “However,” and “In conclusion” provide basic signposting, but some are used mechanically or awkwardly; the second “However” introduces a solution rather than a contrasting point. Improve cohesion by grouping each main idea with its explanation and example, and use clearer references so that relationships between claims are explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “migration,” “agricultural goods,” “traffic congestion,” “rural development,” and “employment opportunities.” This gives you enough language to communicate the main ideas, but the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make parts less clear. For example, “agriculture profit” and “our economy is mostly rely on agricultural goods” do not express the intended meaning naturally, while “contamination” is not the usual term for urban pollution. There are also frequent spelling errors, such as “oppurtunities,” “overcrwoding,” and “infrastruture.” Check spelling carefully and learn topic-specific collocations as complete phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional solution: “these problems can be addressed if government invest in rural development.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. The opening is a fragment beginning “Although,” and “As compares to rural areas, there are less job opportunities” has problems with sentence construction and comparison. Verb forms and agreement also need attention, as in “they becomes successful” and “more people has move.” Punctuation and sentence boundaries are inconsistent, especially in the opening and long sentences. Practise building complete sentences, then check subject–verb agreement and verb forms.

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