Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is irrefutable that the trend of moving to cities has become popular around the world. Therefore, there are numerous people in many countries who moved towards cities, it leads to reduction of population in the villages. This essay intends to discuss whether it is positive development or negative development.

As per my ideology, moving in cities is highly pessimistic. The first and foremost drawback is that housing cost. Since people want a great lifestyle where all facilities available so they are moving towards big cities, it results in high expenses of accommodation and burden. For example, there are a lot of people who move to cities for a great opportunities but they paid low salaries so they hardly able to manage their money and funds such as house rent, electric bills and so on. Consequently, it results in putting burden on low paid individuals.

In addition, shortage of workers is second negative view .If people travel to different countries or cities, it leads in reducing the labour of business in rural areas. For instance, there are numerous masses who move towards cities and local businesses of rural areas reduced such as, agriculture sector and local shops .As a result, the rural business faces trouble like shortage of workers. Consequently, it leads to a reduction in agriculture sectors. Hence, it is negative for rural survivals and farmers.

On the contrary , some people who contradict my view might argued that more facilities is good for individuals who moved big cities. Since urban area provides wide range of facilities , it leads to improve their lifestyles and they also get many benefits. Thus, it leads to give more flexibility to improve their lifestyle .

In conclusion, although more opportunities is great development in moving big cities , there are numerous drawbacks of moving in different cities like shortage of workers and high housing rents.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you consider rural-to-urban migration a negative development, and you support this with relevant points about housing costs and the loss of rural workers. The examples of low-paid migrants struggling with rent and rural businesses losing labour help address the question. You also acknowledge the opposing view that cities offer more facilities, so both sides are considered. However, that counterargument is brief, and the effects on rural communities—especially the decline in agriculture—are repeated rather than fully explained. To strengthen the response, develop each main point with a clearer cause-and-effect explanation and a specific example, while maintaining your negative position consistently through the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for drawbacks and a counterargument, and a conclusion. The sequence from housing costs to rural labour shortages is logical, and signposts such as “In addition” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the discussion. At times, however, linking is mechanical or unclear: “Consequently” is used repeatedly, and the shift to “On the contrary” does not clearly show how the brief opposing view relates to your main argument. Some ideas also repeat, particularly the reduction in rural workers and agriculture. Use a wider range of precise links, make the relationship between claims explicit, and ensure each paragraph advances a distinct point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “housing cost,” “low salaries,” “shortage of workers,” and “agriculture sector,” which makes your main ideas understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “pessimistic” and “contradict my view,” but several choices are inaccurate or unnatural and sometimes make the meaning less clear. Examples include “moving in cities,” “a great opportunities,” “reduction in agriculture sectors,” and “rural survivals.” The vocabulary range is therefore limited and collocations are not consistently controlled. Aim to learn common word partnerships for migration and its effects, and choose direct, accurate expressions rather than formal-sounding phrases that do not fit the context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “Since” and “although,” and the overall meaning can generally be followed. However, errors in sentence construction, verb forms, agreement, articles, and punctuation occur across the response. For example, “there are numerous people … who moved towards cities, it leads” joins two clauses incorrectly; “they hardly able to manage” is missing a verb; and “some people … might argued” uses the wrong verb form. There are also agreement problems in “more opportunities is” and missing or misplaced punctuation around several sentence boundaries. Practise building accurate complex sentences and checking each clause for a subject, a correctly formed verb, and appropriate punctuation.

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