Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many regions around the world, rural people are settling to urban areas, so this causes overpopulation in the cities. I believe that this affects in a negative way in terms of a pollution and competition in job market. In this essay, I will discuss reasons that why this is a negative development before reaching a conclusion.

Firstly, I think that this is a negative development that individuals are moving to cities because it causes overpopulation in cities. When the population in cities increases, it causes pollution and other environmental issues. For instance, transport is a need of everyone on a daily basis. When people travel on the cars, buses and bikes then they burn fuel which leads to pollution and smoke. Therefore, overpopulation may cause enivironmental concerns.

Moreover, in my opinion the increased population may contribute to face challenges in job hunting. Nowadays, a large number of people are qualified and they are already facing difficulty in finding a job. When more individuals will move to cities, it may limit job opportunities for existing people. For example, in healthcare sectors, already doctors are doing their jobs, meanwhile thousands of medical students are graduating each year which make competitive job market. As a result, when more people will settle, this would limit carrer opportunities for existing ones.

In a conclusion, although rapid urbanization causes problems such as pollution and limits jobs prospects, I believe this measure should be helpful for industrilization. From my perspective, the government sould move factories from cities to the countryside and provide space for living to new people. Furthermore, authorities should provide jobs to people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is generally clear: you regard rural-to-urban migration as negative, mainly because of pollution and competition for jobs. Both points are relevant, and the transport example helps explain the environmental concern; the healthcare example also gives some support to your employment argument. However, the discussion remains limited and some claims need clearer development—for example, explain more directly how migration, rather than population growth generally, increases pressure on jobs. The conclusion introduces a contrasting claim that urbanisation may help industrialisation, which is not explained and makes your final position less consistent. The suggestions about moving factories and providing jobs also need to be connected more clearly to your argument. Develop each main idea with a fuller explanation and keep the conclusion aligned with your stated view.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Moreover,” and “For instance” help signal the stages of the discussion, and each body paragraph focuses on a main concern. However, progression is sometimes mechanical, with repeated references to “cities,” “people,” and “population,” and some links between ideas are unclear. For example, “although rapid urbanization causes problems … I believe this measure should be helpful for industrilization” introduces a contrast without explaining how it relates to the preceding argument. The final recommendations also arrive abruptly. Use clearer referencing and make the relationship between each example, its main point, and the conclusion explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “overpopulation,” “environmental issues,” “job hunting,” and “competitive job market.” There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “urbanization” and “job opportunities.” However, the range is limited and several word choices, collocations, and spelling errors reduce precision: “settling to urban areas,” “a pollution,” “limit carrer opportunities,” and “industrilization” are examples. Repetition of “people,” “cities,” and “jobs” also makes the expression less flexible. Aim to use more natural combinations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms for migration, employment pressure, and environmental effects would help express your ideas clearly and avoid awkward phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including conditional and subordinate structures such as “When the population in cities increases…” and “although rapid urbanization causes problems…”. This gives the response some variety, and the overall meaning is usually understandable. However, complex sentences are often not controlled accurately. For example, “I will discuss reasons that why” has an unnecessary structure, while “When more individuals will move” uses an unsuitable future form after “when.” There are also errors with articles and sentence patterns, as in “a pollution,” and agreement in “which make competitive job market.” Review clause construction, verb forms, articles, and subject–verb agreement, then proofread each sentence to improve accuracy while retaining varied structures.

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