Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In my country around the world rural people are moving to cities so the population in the countryside is decreasing . do you think this is a positive or negative development.

Nowdays many people are moving from rural area to cities in search of better opportunities this tread is increased in many countries around the world in my opinion this is a negative development becuse it created problem in both urban and rural areas.

There are serval reason why people move to cities . firstly cities offer better jobs opportunities and higher salaries than villages . many young people move to urban areas to improve their lives standart and support their families financially . secondaly cities general provide better eduction facility and healthcare service for example student from village often move to cities to attend good collage and univercities because they want to bulid a successful career.

Another disadvantage is that villages lose their young and talented population this can create a shortage of worker in agriculiter and other rural industary for instance if most young people leave their villages farmer may struggle to find enough worker to grow crops consequently agriculter product may decrease which can affect the country economy and food supply .

In conclusion altrough moving to cities can provided better employment education and healthcare opportunities . I believe that this is a negative development overall government should created more jobs and improve education and medical facility in rural areas to encourage people to remain in their village .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You give a clear answer that this is a negative development and support it with relevant points about employment, education, healthcare, and the loss of young workers in rural areas. The example of farmers struggling to find workers helps explain the possible effect on food production. However, some points are only briefly developed: the benefits of city migration are listed, but their consequences for urban areas are not explained, despite your opening claim that both urban and rural areas face problems. The response also contains 226 words, below the required 250; the 25 words copied from the task prompt are not counted. Add a fuller explanation or a specific example to develop your main arguments and meet the minimum length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The progression from reasons people move to the effects on villages is generally understandable, and signposts such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion” help guide the reader. However, the organisation is somewhat mechanical, and the first body paragraph focuses on reasons for migration rather than clearly connecting them to your view that it is negative. Some links between ideas are also awkward, particularly the transition from the benefits of city life to the rural labour shortage. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main point, and connect examples explicitly to the argument. Check punctuation around linking words and avoid unnecessary spaces before full stops.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “higher salaries,” “healthcare,” “shortage of worker,” and “food supply.” There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “agricultural” and “financially,” although several words are misspelled or used in inaccurate forms. Examples include “tread” for “trend,” “lives standart,” “collage,” and “agriculiter.” Phrases such as “better jobs opportunities” and “education facility” are also unnatural collocations. These errors are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause, though the overall meaning remains clear. Build accuracy by checking spelling and learning common word partnerships, especially for education, employment, and agriculture.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional example beginning “if most young people leave their villages” and a result clause introduced by “consequently.” This shows some range, and your main message is usually understandable. However, there are several errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms. For example, “this tread is increased” needs a suitable tense and structure, while “moving to cities can provided” should use the base verb after “can.” There are also problems with articles, plurals, and agreement in phrases such as “a shortage of worker” and “government should created.” Some sentences run together without clear punctuation. Practise accurate modal verb patterns, subject–verb agreement, and sentence boundaries while retaining your attempts at complex structures.

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