Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

A considerable number of individuals from backward areas are now moving to cities in many countries around the world. As a result, it is causing a decline in the population of countryside. From my perspective, it is a positive development. In this essay, I will discuss some of the reasons for why people are shifting from their homeland and draw a conclusion.

Nowadays, everyone is working hard for financial stability. People from rural areas are moving to cities due to many reasons. These reasons include lack of healthcare and educational facilities. For example, there are no hospitals with adequate equipment in countryside due to which many individuals have to travel to the cities in order to get a treatment. Furthermore, many students shift to cities in order to continue their higher studies because there is no faculty in schools of rural areas. Another factor contributing this is that there are higher job opportunities in cities as compared to rural areas. For instance, the salaries are higher and a person might get promoted in particular jobs. This is the key factor why adults are motivated to start their jobs and businesses in cities.

On the other hand, the shift of local residents to urban areas might result in a decrease in population of countryside. For example, if a student wants to pursue his education in a city, the whole family will shift and as a result it might lead to a decline in the population in rural areas. It is a positive development because it will lead to social and economic growth of the country.

In conclusion, everyone has a right to get good quality education and make their future stable. Therefore, people should move to urban areas for financial stability. As a result, it is also beneficial for the country's development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you consider rural-to-urban migration positive, and you give relevant reasons, including access to healthcare, education and employment. The examples about travelling for treatment and families relocating for a student’s education help explain why people move. However, the discussion focuses more on the causes of migration than on whether the resulting decline in rural population is beneficial or harmful. The claim that migration brings “social and economic growth” is important but is not explained or supported with a specific example, and possible disadvantages for rural communities are not considered. Develop the consequences of population loss and connect each reason more directly to your judgement to make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable introduction, body paragraphs and conclusion, and the main ideas are generally easy to follow. Linking expressions such as “For example,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” help signal relationships between points. However, progression is not always well controlled: the first body paragraph mainly explains why people move, while the next briefly mentions population decline before returning to the positive judgement. The opening also promises to discuss reasons for moving, rather than clearly previewing an evaluation of the development. Some connections are mechanical, and “On the other hand” suggests a contrast that the paragraph does not really develop. Organise the body around the effects of migration and use transitions that accurately show how each point relates to your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “financial stability,” “healthcare,” “educational facilities,” “job opportunities,” and “economic growth.” These choices make the subject clear, and you attempt some more formal expressions. At times, however, word choice or collocation is awkward or imprecise: “backward areas” can sound judgemental, “there is no faculty in schools” does not clearly express the lack of suitable teaching provision, and “get a treatment” is not the natural phrase in this context. Repetition of “cities,” “rural areas,” and “reasons” also limits flexibility. Aim for precise, neutral terms and vary references to urban and rural communities while keeping collocations natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses with “because,” “if,” and “as a result,” and meaning remains clear throughout. Several sentences are controlled, such as “This is the key factor why adults are motivated to start their jobs and businesses in cities.” Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with articles, prepositions and sentence construction. For example, “a decline in the population of countryside” needs an article before “countryside,” and “contributing this” needs a preposition. The sentence beginning “For example, there are no hospitals…” also becomes awkward when “due to which” links the ideas. Review article use and preposition patterns, and divide or restructure long sentences to improve accuracy.

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