Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Many countries all over the world facing a serious issue that rural people are moving to urban areas. Therefore, the population are falling in the countryside. It is the rising issue these days. In this essay I will discuss this perrspective before presenting my own opinion.

First and foremost, currently rural people are moving to the metropolitian areas. There are few significant reasons of this phenomena; one of the most crucial reason is the job opportunities. In countryside there are no huge business organization and corporation, therefore the residents move into that area which have these organization where we can get job. Furthermore, health and education faclilities are limited in rural areas. People often move into big cites for better education facility and heathcare. There is aslo an important aspect is that these areas have not much entertaiment points where residents can spend their spare time and enjoy with family and friends.

On the other hand, the migration of rural people towards big cites has sgnificant challanges for the big cities. For instance, urban areas are expanding and cosuming fertile land which has detrimenatl effects on country's agriculture sector. Meanwhile, the population of the urban ares are already increasing thereofore it will be really tough for government to provide houses for the new residents. There is aslo another factor is that these rural people will increase the pressure on the city heath and education section which are made for the only city population. Moreover, there is the most essential factor is that if rural public move to the cities, there will be serious shortage of employees for agriculture sector. The number of farmers are decreasing which is really concerning for our food consumption.

In conculsion, in my opinion, I believe it is a negative development and government should think about it and take some serious steps.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address the question and state a clear view in the conclusion: you consider rural-to-urban migration a negative development. The discussion gives relevant reasons, especially pressure on housing, health and education services, and a possible shortage of agricultural workers. However, the position is not fully established until the conclusion, and the opening says you will discuss the issue without indicating your view. Some points are asserted rather than explained: for example, the claim that fewer farmers threaten food consumption would be stronger with a brief explanation of how this affects food supply or prices. The reasons people move—jobs, services and entertainment—are relevant context, but the essay could connect them more directly to your evaluation of whether the overall change is positive or negative.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining why people move, a paragraph outlining negative effects, and a conclusion. This makes the main line of discussion easy to follow, and signposts such as “Furthermore” and “For instance” help guide the reader. The organisation is generally coherent, but some linking is mechanical or repetitive, particularly the repeated use of “There is also” and “Moreover.” The first body paragraph describes causes of migration, while the second evaluates its effects; a clearer transition could show how these points relate to your overall position. Some references, such as “these areas,” are not fully precise. More varied linking and clearer connections between claims would strengthen the progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “job opportunities,” “fertile land,” “agriculture sector,” and “pressure” on public services. These choices help communicate the main ideas, and you attempt more specific terms rather than relying only on basic language. However, spelling errors are frequent and sometimes distract the reader: examples include “metropolitian,” “faclilities,” “entertaiment,” and “conculsion.” There are also inaccurate or unnatural word combinations, such as “entertainment points” and “food consumption” where a more precise expression would fit better. Some repetition of “areas,” “people,” and “factor” limits flexibility. Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations for urbanisation and public services.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including cause-and-effect structures with “therefore” and a relative clause in “areas which are made for the only city population.” This shows some range, and the main meaning is usually understandable. However, errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles and verb forms occur across the response. For example, “Many countries … facing” needs a finite verb, while “the population are falling” has an agreement problem. Phrases such as “one of the most crucial reason” and “which have these organization” also show difficulties with number and agreement. Several sentences beginning “There is …” are awkwardly constructed. Practise building accurate complex sentences and checking subject–verb agreement, articles and plural forms.

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