Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In the contemporary society,pop ulation has bacome a considerable debate. It is often argue that, in nuemrous international cities around the globe,individuals from the backward areas are shifting to the urban areas, so inhabitants in the rural areas have falling. In my openion, it has significant imapct because moving toward the cities can make the country more successfull by hard working and people of rural areas can achive more facilities to overcaome the financial crisis from the rural areas.

On one hand ,migrating from rural areas to urban areas has a significant impact on the countries to increase the bussiness on larg scale, so that bussiness on larg scale can earn more money that leads toward the stability of economy. For example, those individuals that are come from out side the country, they do not have more money to survive their life, they run a small bussiness with some citizen to earn money, due to this businessess pay the taxes or some funds to the government that make successful country. As a result, our admanistrartions can build industries in the rural areas to make some kind of products like fabrics to sale all over the world, by doing this countries get more moeny from all over the globe.

On the other side, moving residen from unsuccessful areas to successful areas increas the education level of the country because the living rate from the rulal area is decreased, so these populations achive high education from the cities.for instance, peoples from out side go to cities and take admissions from the high level schools of colleges to seek knowelgs in filed of busnisess, medical deparment or healt conerns. Furthermore they enhnace there skills at large level. As a result, these kind of individuals make the schools in the rurals areas to explore the worlwide knoweldge.

In conclusion, according to my prespectives in many countries all over the world should have to move toward the successful areas, so that they can enhance their knoweldge or leave the rural ares to use for making industries to stable the economy or build schools to explore the knowelde between uneducated peoples.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall view that rural-to-urban migration is positive, and you attempt to support it with points about economic activity, education and access to facilities. The examples about small businesses and people studying in cities are relevant to the topic. However, the response only partly develops the question: the economic argument shifts from migration to building industries in rural areas, while the education point is difficult to follow and does not clearly show how rural depopulation benefits the country. The conclusion also recommends that people “should have to move,” which is stronger and less qualified than the reasoning supports. To develop the response further, explain the causal links more clearly and address a possible disadvantage, such as the loss of workers and services in rural communities.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and signposts such as “On one hand,” “On the other side” and “In conclusion” help identify the stages of the argument. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven: the first body paragraph moves from migrants’ small businesses to government investment in rural industries without explaining the connection, and the second moves from education in cities to building schools in rural areas. Some linking phrases are repetitive or do not express the relationship accurately, while long sentences make the line of reasoning harder to follow. Use one main idea per paragraph, then develop it through a clear explanation and example. More precise referencing and fewer formulaic transitions would make the argument easier to track.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “stability of economy,” “education level,” “industries” and “financial crisis,” and you use some relevant terms to discuss migration and development. However, the range is limited by repeated general words such as “successful,” “areas” and “individuals,” and several choices or collocations are unclear, for example “living rate,” “explore the worldwide knowledge” and “make successful country.” Frequent spelling errors—including “bussiness,” “knowelgs” and “admanistrartions”—also make the reader work to understand your meaning. Build a more accurate set of phrases for migration, employment and public services, and check spelling carefully. Prefer precise, natural combinations over ambitious wording that does not convey a clear meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “so that” and “as a result.” This shows an effort to connect ideas, but complex sentences are often difficult to control, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “inhabitants in the rural areas have falling” has an incorrect verb form, while “those individuals that are come” combines incompatible verb forms. There are also problems with agreement and sentence boundaries, as in “these populations achive high education from the cities.for instance.” Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check verb tense, agreement, articles and punctuation. Shorter, accurate sentences will help make your reasoning clearer before you add more complex structures.

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