Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many parts of the Earth , rural individuals are moving towards to cities , therefore population in the villeges are now decreasing.In my opinion , this is the postive development because they can improve there lifestyles and recieve basic facilities easily and more reasons will i explain in the following paragraphs.

First and foremost , people who are living in rural villege they can not recieve basic facilities most of the time.For instance , many time people are sick and they have some serious issue related to health but there are no sufficient medical facilities they can recieve at there village.As a result , there sickness become a serious disease for them but in cities they can easily recieve these things.Seconaly , sometimes it happens in many parts of the country that people not recieve electrical faciltiy such as lights or fans and they have to face this problem regulary which is not oftenly happens in the cities.

Thirdly , in rural area there are not enough facilites for eduction.For that pupils who have interets in study and they want to become a person who experts in different area such as doctor , engineer therefore, they must have move to city , where they can recieve a better education.Lastly , in rural area people could not get qulity of life which they can get in city.For example , if there is any kind of big functions people want to organize for that they have to come to cities and buy things which help them in function , instead of that if they live in urban area than it is become simple for them to buy things and it's actully saves their time.

To sum up , population are decreased from the countryside is actually benefical for people because they can receive such a basic facilities easily that is very hard to get in villeges.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you consider rural-to-urban migration positive because it improves access to facilities and quality of life. You address the question and give relevant reasons, including healthcare, electricity, education and access to shops. The healthcare and education points are supported with examples, so the response meets the task well overall. However, some support is less convincing or developed: the example about organising functions and buying things does not clearly show why population decline benefits people, and the electricity point is asserted rather than explained. To strengthen the response, explain the consequences of each reason more precisely and connect each example directly to your view. The clear stance and relevant ideas are established, but fuller, more consistently developed support is still needed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs developing reasons, and a conclusion that restates your view. Sequencing phrases such as “First and foremost,” “Secondly,” “Thirdly,” and “To sum up” help readers follow the main points. This gives the essay a coherent overall arrangement. However, the linking can feel mechanical because several points are introduced in a list-like way, and some connections between sentences are unclear. For example, the move from limited rural education to the claim that people “must have move to city” would benefit from a clearer explanation of the link. The final example about functions also interrupts the focus on essential services. Use fewer formulaic transitions and make each paragraph develop one central idea in a more connected sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “medical facilities,” “electrical facility,” “quality of life,” and “better education,” so your meaning is generally understandable. There are also attempts to express specific ideas rather than relying entirely on very basic words. However, the range and control are limited, and noticeable spelling and word-choice errors sometimes make the reader pause: examples include “villeges,” “postive,” “recieve,” “faciltiy,” and “qulity.” Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “rural individuals” and “receive these things.” Aim to learn accurate topic vocabulary and common word partnerships, and proofread spelling carefully. More precise, natural phrasing would make your reasons clearer and help you express the same ideas with greater flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses with “because,” “but,” and “if,” which shows an effort to vary sentence structure. The main message can usually be understood, but control is inconsistent: complex sentences often contain several grammatical problems, and errors recur across the response. For example, “people who are living in rural villege they can not recieve” has an incomplete relative-clause construction, while “they must have move to city” has an incorrect verb form and missing article. There are also problems with agreement and sentence boundaries, as in “population are decreased.” Work on building accurate sentence patterns first, especially articles, subject–verb agreement, verb forms and punctuation. Shorter, carefully checked sentences will help you communicate your ideas more reliably.

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